(Optional) Revision of Essay 1 or Essay 2

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I completed the assignment and submitted for correction to which there were few mistakes that were pointed out from the lecturer. The lecturer commended me for…


sed that it should take the format of stating the thesis in the first paragraph before embarking on analysis of the photo in the subsequent paragraphs. Subsequent paragraphs should be linked to the thesis then proceed with a clear and valid conclusion.
In the final essay, I managed to make few corrections as had been advised earlier on. I reduced the long sentences that characterized the first copy to shorter but more coherent sentences. I then reduced the number of pages by one from the initial five to four. The second copy also included the reflective essay about the first work and the corrections made. I developed the thesis right away in the first paragraph although it was a little different from the first one. I then tried very much to support the thesis in the subsequent paragraphs. I then made a conclusion that reflected what had been discussed in the document keeping in mind all the corrections i was advised to make.
Comparing the first document to the final one, I realized the second was better. I also managed to learn and acquire experience of writing such papers. This exercise is not very difficult as I had thought it would be the first time I was given the assignment.
The photo represents a caption of the waiting room of the Union Station (LOC) photographed by Jack Delano. From the general look, the photo represents a caption of people waiting at the train station to probably board the train. However, from a closer look at the photo, it can be seen that the focus of the photo man was at the two gentle men standing at the foreground. The probable interest might be a case that appears to be of concern to the gentlemen as can be seen from their looks. The picture communicates a lot of information about the nature of activities and the people in the caption, however, among the messages in the picture, one is dominant. A case that is troubling the two gentle men and the others in the picture even though among the concerned parties, the two gentle men ...
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