The Sexual Portrayal of Women in Literature - Essay Example

? 19 May, Sexual portrayal of women in literature: Man and woman are attracted towards each other, and sex happens to be the focus of this attraction particularly for man, while a woman generally looks for sympathy, honesty, and faith in her relationship. Most men visualize women as tools that are quite suitable to have sex with, and the literature has traditionally portrayed it like that; “The contact of her warm, palpitating body when he had unthinkingly drawn her into his arms, had aroused all the old-time infatuation and desire for her flesh” (Lombardi 1). Sexual relationship between a man and a woman has always been a very interesting yet controversial subject, and has conventionally invited a lot of debate with respect to their respective roles in the sex. In the lack of marital commitment, the regime in sexuality lies in the hands of man, whereas the woman follows him to gain the basic level of pleasure in sex. Marriage lays the basis of morality in the physical relationship between a man and a woman, and men generally respect this fact. When a man gets married to a woman, he accepts her wholeheartedly and shares his pleasures and sorrows with her. He considers the woman as his real life partner and shares everything he has with her, including property and all bounties of life. This is portrayed in several parts of Happy Ending by Margaret Astwood. With the passage of time, the two get used to each other and can not live without each other. They may have individualistic interests, but they derive satisfaction from the fact that they are committed to each other. Their sex life is quite normal, and wives do not have to be slaves to their husband to derive sexual pleasure and physical satisfaction. They may have sex quite often or they may not have sex at all, though, in no case, does the husband supersede the wife on the ground of sex. Commitment of sexes towards each other is fundamental to their equality in sex. In the sexual relationship between John and Mary explained in the part B of Happy Endings by Margaret Atwood, Mary is enslaved to John. This part depicts the psychology of cohabiting that is increasingly becoming a practice in many modern societies. Owing to high divorce rates, and the general tensions associated with marriage, women tend to look for the right man to whom they can get married. In their attempt to avoid a displeasing marital experience, they resolve to cohabit with men, and tend to make the men love them and get used to them before both of them can enter the sacred institution of marriage. In the practice of cohabiting, men take maximum benefit of their privileged position. They take advantage of the weakness of women and use them for physical satisfaction and that too, in the most indecent manner. Men are far more decent towards women in marital sex as compared to sex out of marriage. This can be estimated from the order in which John undresses himself to have sex with Mary in the part B of Happy Endings by Margaret Atwood. A person with shear common sense and humanity will expect any kind of decent sex to start with emotional stimulation of both the partners. Decent sex is smooth and full of fantasies, feelings, emotions, and respect of both genders towards each other. Respect is fundamental to the decency in sex. In decent sex, whoever initiates the sex seeks approval from the partner. The two enter into sex through mutual consensus and the sex is driven by acknowledgement and encouragement of each other’s sexual fantasies. In such a sex, both of the partners would fully undress and would like to stimulate each other to the apogee of orgasm. The man in a respectful sexual relationship would like to see the body of his partner, and would appreciate the beauty of it both verbally and physically, whereas in the part B of Happy Endings, John does not show the slightest interest in looking at the body of Mary. He never asks her to take her clothes off. He doesn't take off Mary's clothes, she takes them off herself, she acts as if she's dying for it every time, not because she likes sex exactly, she doesn't, but she wants John to think she does because if they do it often enough surely he'll get used to her, he'll come to depend on her and they will get married. (Atwood). This essentially tells how weak Mary’s position in the sex without marriage is. However, sexual relationship between Mary and John is much more respectful and ideal when the two are married to each other in the part A of Happy Endings. Their sex life in the marital relationship is “stimulating and challenging” (Atwood), whereas in the sex out of marriage, the sex life is only challenging and not stimulating for Mary, while John’s sex life is all stimulating and not challenging at all. Mary has to face the challenge of bearing the sexual assault and physical abuse while John would entice himself, and yet pretend that she is enjoying to her full so that John would have it more often with her, and would ultimately get used to her, and the two can enter the institution of marriage. A woman can share his boyfriend’s body with another woman, but not his emotional attachment with her. This essentially tells that for unmarried woman, winning the emotional attachment of the boyfriend is the top priority because this would ultimately make him resolve to get married to her. This can be estimated from the fact that in the part B of Happy Endings, when Mary is told by her friends that they have seen John dine with another woman in a restaurant, what she minds is not his John’s company with Madge. Instead, what bothers her is the fact that John would rather take Madge to the restaurant and scold Mary for a badly cooked food at home. “It's not even Madge that finally gets to Mary: it's the restaurant. John has never taken Mary to a restaurant” (Atwood). Having realized this, Mary injures herself and expects John to turn up, be sorry and marry her, which he never does because he is not committed to her. Sexual relationship outside marriage does not become any better for a girl even if the man is much elder to her, and gives her due respect. This can be estimated from the part C of Happy Ending. Though a woman may acquire sexual equality after marriage, she can, by no way, keep her husband from betraying her sexually. It is men’s nature. They consider women they are married to as their property that they would not like to share with anybody, but they feel no shame making love with women they are not married to. This can be estimated from the fact that John has a sexual relationship with Mary who is the age of his daughter, while he is married to Madge. Madge and John’s sexual relationship is quite normal, and the two adequately satisfy each other sexually. In spite of that, John needs to make love with women other than Madge. This tells that although the two may acquire sexual equality after marriage, it costs a woman much to sustain the marital relationship throughout the life. Literature has conventionally shown women sacrificing to save their marriage. “I meant to be such a help to John, such a real rest and comfort, and here I am a comparative burden already! Nobody would believe what an effort it is to do what little I am able, -- to dress and entertain, and order things” (Gilman). Nonetheless, John is responsible enough not to marry Mary because he is married to, or more importantly, “committed to” Madge. “John tells Mary how important she is to him, but of course he can't leave his wife because a commitment is a commitment” (Atwood). An analysis of the literature that elaborates the sexual activity between two partners from opposite genders without the legal approval of their relationship through marriage suggests that the relationship is distressful for the women, and they are on the losing end, even if they are provided with due respect, money and other essentials of life. This can fundamentally be attributed to the lack of commitment from the man’s side towards the woman. A woman can not have a pleasing sex unless she is sure that the man is wholeheartedly hers and is committed to her. However, what makes it more tragic is not the fact that women tend to keep lying about their inner feelings till death. They pretend that everything is normal, when it is actually not! It is as if the worries are so consistent and uninterrupted that they brainwash the women and they tend to accept the male dominance on the grounds of sex when the two are not married to each other. According to their portrayal in literature, women can only gain the importance and respect for their gender from their husbands. Works Cited: Atwood, Margaret. ““Happy Endings”.” n.d. Web. 19 May 2011. . Gilman, Charlotte P. “The Yellow Wallpaper.” 1860-1935. Web. 19 May. 2011. . Lombardi, Esther. “'The Storm' - Short Story.” 2011. Web. 19 May. 2011. . Read More