Why Lovers Can't Be Friends

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Oftentimes, it is said, that friends can become lovers but lovers can never be friends. I find this statement partly true and partly not. I think it depends upon the kind and depth of relationship that two people share.
I want to propose that friends can be lovers and lovers can be friends depending on the quality of their relationship, the length of time they have spent together, and the kind of friendship they want to pursue.


Conlon continues to suggest that friendship and love (romantic love) are two different things. According to him, friends "share a view of the world and focus their efforts on that vision." In this case, friends take pleasure and delight in the vision of the world that they share and both are benefited in their partnership.
However, lovers are only "absorbed in each other and delight from their experience of each other." In this case, the only common denominator between lovers is pleasure derived from each other. Once this experience is removed, they fall apart.
The article of Conlon seems to be 'an attempt to reorient our thinking about romantic relationships." Instead of believing that romantic love is the ideal relationship that most people look forward to having experienced, Conlon proves that "people need to be made more aware that relationships can take many forms and that no one form may automatically trump the others when it comes to which arrangement is good or best for someone to enter into."
Rita Watson, as she writes about relationships in Some Ex-Lovers Can't Be Friends attests that she has no doubt that based on her experience and observation, some lovers cannot be friends. ...
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