Having Sex, Getting Sex and Getting Gotten - Essay Example

It is also true that individuals in a relationship the feel they are over benefiting also report lower levels of satisfaction (Cohen, 2006). This theory seems to ignore the idea of attachment and relationships. It seems to be treating sex as a business relationship as is described in the text. That seems extreme when even the social exchange theory, which says that intimacy is the product of a reward-cost history in the interaction between two people, understands that intimacy is involved. It is believed that intimacy is relative.

Not all intimate relationships are the same. The social exchange theory is an attempt to explain all intimate relationships, not as irrational or selfless, but as a product of the fact that people love those who offer more rewards and fewer punishments than others. The loved one must not only be desirable but must reciprocate one’s attentions. This theory would say that people who fall in love begin by engaging in a kind of bargaining process wherein assets and debits are evaluated and matched.

Looking for love means searching for rewards and punishments. Research does seem to support both the social exchange theory and the equity hypothesis as explanations for the first phases of pair formation. Several surveys indicate that both parties in an demonstrated that both members of an inequitable relationship were unhappy. The question that comes from this is, it there no such thing as unconditional love? The social exchange theory does the best job of describing liking rather than love.

Our text does not even get to the point of liking the individual rather it is liking of the act or intercourse and possibly exploiting another to get it or being willing to be exploited to get it (Stevins-Long & Commons, 2002). Again, this writer goes back to developmental stages. The adolescent may begin in this equity bargaining stage of