Parenting Model Metaphor - Essay Example

In a game of chess, to be able to win, a player must move the right piece at the right time. That also happens in parenting. When parents want their children to behave well, they need to send the right message at the right time to them. Children are very sensitive sometimes. Parents might feel a short message or an unexplained order is enough to control their children’s behavior. The children, on the other hand, might think that the short unexplainable message means that they are not needed or that they are not loved.

Taking time to help the children understand what happens around them, what is expected from them, and what will happen if they do that is very crucial for parents to make them understand and, more importantly, feel appreciated. (Chapter 12) A game of chess is played step by step. In this game, it is impossible to move all the pieces at the same time without disrupting the rule. At most, in special occasions, the player can only move two pieces in the same turn. This is also true in parenting.

Parents-children relationship cannot be built in a day. Their trust is built through simple and continuous daily interactions. Parents, even mothers, cannot expect their children to completely accept them trustfully from the very first day. Children, especially infants, will grow closer and more attached when the parents keep showing their affections through loving and caring contacts like when these parents change their diapers, feed them, comfort them, or talk to them. (Chapter 12) A chess player indeed needs to capture the opponent’s chess king to win the game.

However, it doesn’t mean that the player should forget his/her own chess king. He/She must guard the king carefully so that the opponent is unable to capture it. Does this defense also apply in parenting? Yes, it does. Promoting and keeping guard of a secure attachment with their children should be a major goal of all good parents. Parents who are