Premarital Cohabitation Effect - Essay Example

Negativity is what leads to the cohabitation effect (which is an association between cohabitation and poor marital outcome) and what discourages some people (such as staunch Christians, the aged, or those who have had previous experience) from cohabiting.
Commitment theory is used to explain and make people understand how cohabitation leads to divorce or even distress. The theory is divided into two commitments: dedication and constraint commitments. Dedication commitment explains how couples who stay together have dreams and plans about their long-term future and is also characterized by putting the needs of the other partner first. In cases of cohabitation, dedication is minimal and hence partners end up leaving each other. The constraint commitment on the other hand explains how there are forces in a relationship that facilitate people leaving or having unhappy relationships including values, children’s welfare, and even social pressure.

Premarital and marital counseling according to Hawkins (1991) insists on ensuring a strong healthy relationship that is based on a long-term commitment to a partner. It is the lack of this long-term commitment (brought about by cohabiting which is not a long-term commitment) that leads to the breaking up of couples' relationships and an increase in divorce cases.

Premarital counseling advocates for communication when couples are in a relationship. This communication leads to deeper intimacy, love, understanding, and tolerance for each other and the relationship issues in general. People in a cohabitation type of relationship do not feel committed and hence do not bother with issues of thinking and planning about the future let alone dedicate themselves to open communication. This sets up a bad example to others cohabiting or wanting to cohabit and hence the negative attitude towards this form of relationship.

The negative attitude of some people toward marriage as opposed to cohabiting is a result of the increased divorce rates among married people. Based on the article and an explanation about marriage by Worthington and Worthington, it is evident that such marriages fail because couples have been in cohabiting relationships which as mentioned above lack commitment, tolerance, and communication among other virtues advocated by marriage counselors. Such marriages are therefore constrained by historical issues (from the cohabiting relationships) and cannot, therefore, withstand any arising marital issues that require dedication and commitment.

If people do not cohabit, the divorce rate would decrease as people will not have had previous trial marriage experience that is without boundaries, restrictions, and commitment among other virtues. On the other hand, these negative trends can end if couples wanting to cohabit first attend premarital counseling sessions. Read More