Healthy Grief and Grieving Process Established by Kubler-Ross - Essay Example

Healthy Grief 04/09/14 Grief can be described as an emotion felt when a person losses close partner. Grief is commonly the outcome of the death (Twu counseling center). When a person loses a close relative, a child, parent or a close friend, his or her emotions may respond in a manner that brings about pain. This painful response on emotion is referred to as grief. Most of the people are so much affected by grief. They become unconscious due to the deep bond that they were connected with the departed person. In this regard, must such persons to develop a positive attitude that would enable them to deal with grief. The positive attitude develops as a result of someone acknowledging that the departed person or item is irreversible. The acknowledgment will help a person to act a near normal in case of departure. The positive attitude towards grief is what the psychologists refers to as a healthy grief. There are five stages that are involved when helping a bereaved person to recover from the grief. The grieving process established by Kubler-Ross projects some reactions that Job underwent in his life that is described in the Bible. The denial stage is the beginning point of the healing process. At this stage, the bereaved person will want to deny his or her real situation that he or she is facing (Kubler-Ross, 1969, p. 140). In other words, as the term denial suggests, the person will want to focus on other issues in order to feel like he or she is acting on the normal life. Drawing the perspective from the biblical account of Job, after all his children and animals died, he acted as though there was nothing happened to him. He preferred to suggest that all he had was given to him by God and if he had decided to take it back; he had no other measure to deal with the situation. The second stage that forms part of Kubler-Ross grief process is that of anger (Kubler-Ross, 1969). Shortly after the denial process, the bereaved person will come to the reality that he or she has lost a dear one or a property that is so valuable. There is an increase of emotional pain that affect the bereaved person (Nithyananda, 2007, p. 175). The person begins to be troubled by questions regarding the cause of the loss. For example, you will hear people asking, why did this happened to me? The power of anger in manifested in many ways and blames will arise towards himself and to others. In the Biblical story of Job, we see him having anger in the way he tore his clothes and went into the road and stayed without food. The only thing he did was to sit on the road for three days without even taking a meal or talking to his friends who came to condole him. His wife became angry and had to advice Job to curse the Lord and die rather than living in pain. Another stage towards grieving is bargaining stage (Kubler-Ross, 1969, p. 230). Individuals who have lost their loved ones or valuable property may turn to having hope for the future. This process entails the view of believing that even though they have lost their loved ones, they will work hard and get what they have lost. For Job, he was trustful to the Lord that even though he had taken away his wealth and children, he will once again have them if he continues trusting the one who had given him. God accomplished his desires by blessing him by doubling the wealth that he had previously. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross suggest that it is at this stage the bereaved person will tend to make every effort to make sure that they prolong their lives. For Job, it was time to rebuild his relationship with God and make sure that his life was restored. From the bargaining stage, the bereaved person will tend to feel an emptiness in the space that was once occupied by the dead. The extended feeling of a void may create leads to depression (Kubler-Ross, 1969, p. 241). The depression process is the most difficult and dangerous. A person may turn to silence, cry a lot and even reject friends and visitors who have come to condole him or her. The depression may cause permanent damage of an individual in terms of sickness. In the Bible, depression was evident in the manner that Job had refused to talk to his friends but was only mourning silently. It is after this stage that the person will begin to accept what have already happened. Acceptance is the stage where the bereaved comes to let it go of what had happened (Kubler-Ross, 1969, p. 263). They come to learn that what had happened is a must and therefore that is only a fulfilment. They, therefore, returns to normal and goes on with their daily activity. Joy have a connection to the discussed grieving process. Learning to appreciate that life is short and that anyone living on earth will one day come to an end may bring some joy to the bereaved person. For example, if someone’s wife has died, it will sometimes take for the memory of the wife to get erased from the husband’s mind. But the husband can get on and marry another wife who will give him joy. He will have joy by appreciating that the living is more valuable than the dead. After Job’s children died, he valued his wife more than the dead children. They, therefore, got blessed with other children who brought joy into the house. With respect to my ways of handling grief, I have found that there are ways in which I can add to my needs. Usually, my ways of handling grief will be looking for a person who is close to me or to the bereaved person. A person can be a counsellor, a relative or a friend. The role of this individual is to give the company to the grieved person and to give them some comfort. After reading the Kubler-Ross stages in grieving process, I have found out that healing from the grievance is a process and not an instant achievement. I do recommend all social counsellors to appreciate this work in their efforts to help those in need. References Kubler-Ross, E. (1969). On death and dying. New York: Macmillan. Nithyananda, P. (2007). So You Want to Know the Truth. Karnataka, India: eNPublishers. Twu counseling center. (n.d.). Grief and Loss: Getting Over the Death of Someone Close to You. Retrieved from Grief and Loss.pdf: http://www.twu.edu Read More