Reflecting on My Social Intelligence Behaviors - Assignment Example

Name Instructor: Course: Date: Reflecting on my social intelligence behaviors Over the years I have not known myself to be such a nourishing person until I took up the social intelligence self assessment quiz which actually proved to me that I actually bear more nourishing behavior as compared to my toxic behavior. These nourishing behaviors could evidently be depicted in my character without any doubt, as the toxic ones came out not so outstanding and evident as they make me feel devalued, inadequate, guilty, frustrated and angry as opposed to the nourishing behaviors, which make people feel valued, capable, loved, respected and appreciated. The five most outstanding nourishing behaviors that I very easily recognized in myself were as follows: offering information, ideas and options, supporting others; sympathizing, persuading honestly; negotiating, wearing a friendly, invitation expression and kidding or joking positively. On the contrary, I have no toxic behaviors except for changing the subject capriciously and letting the topic ‘’play out’’ where I had an equal mixture of both toxic and nourishing behaviors. However, hearing others out, sharing ‘’airtime’’ with others praising the success of others and communicating openly and honestly turned out to be mostly nourishing behaviors against interrupting others frequently, monopolizing the conversation, bragging, scoring ‘’status points’’ and playing ‘’head games,’’ and manipulating. The above highest nourishing behaviors have helped me form strong relationship with others as they make people feel valued and loved by me as those behaviors are self articulated and esteemed in me. For instance, I freely and readily offer information and ideas to people whenever that information, I think could be of importance to them. I rarely hesitate to help whenever I feel I should and have the appropriate ideologies and information concerning certain problems. Similarly, it is my nature to sympathize with other people in vulnerable situations and hence I am always in the forefront to support them whenever I can. On the other hand, in a matter of a subject of contention, a times I like changing the subject randomly but this also I manage by letting the topic ‘’play out’’ to make it get even. In relation to toxic and nourishing behaviors, I would like openness and feeling free to receive people’s responses and feedback concerning my behavior. This will be fundamental to my leadership development such that as I get their feedback I find the challenges which I react to by adjusting my behavior and also my strengths which I thereafter maintain and improve on as well. On the contrary, I would like less of changing the subject capriciously as that shows postponement of a problem or running away from solving it. A subject needs to be fully exhausted before another can possibly crop in hence its full potential utilized and problems diagnosed. A leader cannot leave subjects, which are not fully resolved, and jump into other new subjects for this will show their lack of competence as leaders to handle situations. Therefore as a leader, feedback and complete exhaustion of a subject are very important. According to Joseph and Lakshmi, [Jos10], people with high social intelligence have a high attraction to others compared to the magnetic attraction that make people themselves get attracted to you, they are friendly, supportive and caring, hence more successful in life. On the other hand, people with low social intelligence have interpersonal relationship problems, which make them end up misfits in the society. To even up, there is this group of people in society with neither high nor low level of social intelligence, these end up getting confused and do not even know where they belong as they have toxic behavior as much as their nourishing behavior. With that therefore, Joseph and Lakshmi tell us that poor social intelligence can be improved or cultivated to bring forth good interpersonal relationship for one’s success in life. In this aspect, it is very difficult to change nourishing behavior to be toxic because they have to do with someone’s emotions and what is a routine in someone’s behavior. However, changing form toxic to nourishing behavior is thus such an easy task since people are always encouraged to uphold social values and morals. By doing so, they stand a high chance of behaving in a manner likely to suggest that they are crossing over from toxic behavior to nourishing behavior even without themselves realizing. Effective listening skills come about when one is able to lend out his/her ears to what others say attentively, giving others time to speak, being patient with others to air out their views whether they are wrong or right. To achieve this goal, one needs to learn to listen appreciatively without judging others. I need to appreciate the speaker to give them encouragement instead of criticizing them since that will just demoralize them. I also need to hear others out by responding to their calls, problems and needs. It is not just enough to listen to someone speak but to make it complete, it is better to respond by attending to the plea of the words from the speaker. Other people can help me out in different ways to achieve this goal as the family members can help me with the resources needed to respond to the voices, friends will help me by giving me a listening motive hence letting me know how best I should listen to others just the way my friends listen to me. Co-workers are supposed to treat me as friendly as a person they work with to exhibit good working relations hence good listening skills to one another will apply. Here I will be able to learn how to listen to people as co-workers listen to one another. On thinking positively, this is where I will need to always value the good side of things and not make negative side overcrowd the better part of it. One can think positively by concentrating on the positive attributes of a subject rather than the negative attributes. I will be able to think positively by wearing a friendly, inviting expression, persuading honestly and communicating openly and honestly. Other people like my family will help me through this by soliciting moral support, affection and advice from the elder members of the family. Friends would not wish something bad to happen to me and therefore they always think positively about other friends hence they contribute by showing me the values of thinking positively about other friends. Feeling free to receive feedbacks is a situation whereby one frankly recognizes the responses from which he will be able to adjust his behavior towards the desirable levels. Responses or feedback are fundamental in changing someone’s behavior such that one will try to change a toxic behavior to a nourishing one when the feedback is negative while maintaining and improving on the nourishing ones when the feedback is positive. To achieve this goal, I will be able to acknowledge and affirmatively accept others, hears others out, sharing airtime with others rather than monopolizing the conversation and much more by expressing respect for others’ ideas by avoiding inflexibility and dogmatic speeches. In a nut- shell, I realized that my life is successful because I have high social intelligence since my toxic-nourishing scale reads 92, which is next to highest nourishing behavior. This means for us to succeed with the interpersonal relationships, we need to improve and transform our toxic behaviors to cross over to nourishing behavior. Work cited Jos10: , (Joseph and Lakshmi), Jos10: , (Joseph and Lakshmi), Read More