This second day we will focus on goes by the somewhat curious name of Black Friday. While no clear record seems to exist to truly explain the name, several theories will be presented in this paper.
The first truly remarkable aspect of this ritual is the official start of the day. The time keeping of these primitive beings divided a day into 24 segments called hours. This segmentation was then divided into AM and PM divisions with AM roughly occurring during the daylight hours and PM roughly coordinating with nighttime hours, thus each day would begin at 12:00 AM and end at 11:59 PM. Such an elaborate time system was obviously a bad idea for the primitive North Americans. Evidence for this can be found in the fact that Black Friday seemed to begin earlier and earlier each year. Many “SALES” (explained hereafter) touted as the official start of Black Friday actually began on Thursday (Turkey Day). The fact that Black Friday begins before the official start of the day Friday is a testament to the backwardness of this civilization.
The second remarkable element of Black Friday is the frenzied hunting of SALES. These curious items seemed to be able to take nearly any shape. From the official start of Black Friday on Thursday evening right through the day, inhabitants of North America would look for SALES inside the packaging of common goods such as socks, toaster ovens and automobiles. The celebrants would line up outside of warehouses in order to find SALES. When SALES were located, many “shoppers” as the people are called, will notify others using cellular communication devices about the location of the SALES. Usually the people arriving later were disappointed when they arrived because the SALES had disappeared. Often, when this happened, the Chief Priest of Black Friday called the Manager would be summoned so he could teach the shoppers about other SALES.
A final aspect of