Should Gay Couples be Able to Marry - Essay Example

? SHOULD GAY COUPLES BE ABLE TO MARRY Institute Homosexuality has been ed to many debates and it is seen from different perspectives. The number of same sex couples has greatly increased in the last four decades. A subject that is now considered is that whether the same sex couples should be allowed to get married or not. Same sex couples consider marriage to be their right owing to the fact that every being deserves liberty. It has also been identified that a person is born with the characteristics of a homosexual. Same sex couples wish to lead normal lives without any societal bias and discrimination. On the other hand, same sex marriages are opposed by religious and moral groups who consider it to be unnatural. It is also argued that it is not a normal way of leading life and they present that same sex marriages should not be permitted. Should Gay Couples Be Able to Marry With the broadening of the human mind and the understanding of relationships, the road to new controversies has emerged and there are many matters which have become subjects of hot debates. The human behavior has changed and every human being has acquired knowledge regarding the fact that they have the right to choose and opt for what they want. Homosexual relationships provide with a very good example of controversy that has been emerging since the last quarter of the twentieth century. It is not that gays did not exist before this period but a true fact is that every human being has come to analyze and understand their importance in this world and it is a belief that a person has a right to choose for his life. Fight against woman’s suppression and racism was followed by the homosexuals who also needed proper identification and the opportunity to live their lives the way they want to. On one side the gays demand the provision of rights for them to marry and live normal lives on the basis of the fact that every human being has a right to choose their way of living. On the other side their demands have been subjected to criticism by many religious and social groups who argue that this violates social and ethnic values of the human being and legalizing their marriages would actually give a boost to this way of life. Thus it is from these arguments that a question arises whether the gay couples should be granted the right to marry. According to a survey conducted by the William’s Institute, it can be analyzed that the number of same sex couples is increasing in the United States. Its first study in the year 2000 indicated the fact that the number of the same sex couples was 594,391 whereas this number increased to 776,943 in the year 2005. This increase in the number of same sex couples is accompanied by the fight of these groups for their rights to be legally married (Romero et al 2007). The last decade of the twentieth century showed the initiation of many legal hearings on the controversy that whether the gays should be allowed to marry or not. The year 1993 served as a beginning for this cause in the United States when the Supreme Court in Hawaii took a strong stand against the denial of three same sex couple to get married by a lower court. The court upheld the fact that this refusal to the couple to get married was not correct as this indicated sexual discrimination. Similar hearings were followed in the Supreme Courts of Alaska and Vermont in the years 1998 and 1999 respectively but there was still no definite decision taken and same sex marriage was not officially allowed in any state. It was in the year 2000 that the marriage of same sex couples was permitted in the state of Vermont which was the first State in the United States to allow these marriages. Several other Supreme Court rulings were followed and in some states the same sex couples were married and New Mexico formed an example of a state where these couples were married but later their marriages were declared void. In the same year 2004, President Bush also invalidated and declared same sex marriages to be illegal. Thus this issue of legalizing gay marriages has been persisting in the United States since two decades but no unanimous decision has been adopted for this issue (New York Times 2010, Human Rights Campaign,Staff Reports 2004). “There can be a conflict between religious liberty and sexual liberty, but in almost all cases, the sexual liberty should win because that’s the only way that the dignity of gay people can be affirmed in any realistic manner.” This is the statement of Chai Feldblum who was the attorney of the American Civil Liberties Union. His stand indicates the fact that a person has a right to choose for his liberty and what he wishes to do in his sexual life. Much like other liberties that every human being has, a person also has the right to choose for his partner according to his interests (Alliance Defense Fund). It is argued that sexual liberty associated with marriages is extremely essential for gays. This is because they believe that marriage is a term that means devotion and dedication to their partner in all times of life that is periods of difficulty and in times of happiness. They argue that it is extremely important for their relationship to be given a proper name and status so that they can also live freely without being subjected to discrimination in all fields. It also assists the same sex couples in attaining proper recognition in the society and they are identified as a couple (Freedom to Marry). Another very important factor that can be seen by the proponents of gay marriages is that the stigma associated with it due to the fact that gay marriages are not legalized creates a difficult situation for the same sex couple family unit. It has been seen that this labeling of same sex marriages as wrong makes it difficult for these people to understand their own emotions and hence leads to the suppression of their feelings (The Independent 2007). Lynch (2004) clearly indicates in her research very clearly the fact that many heterosexual couples get married due to the customs and societal stereotyping that heterosexual relationships are acceptable in the society. It is later in their life that they analyze the fact that this is not what they really wanted. The result is the divorces and the strain that occurs due to the ending of these heterosexual relationships. Also the children of homosexual parents have a difficult time due to the fact that the family models that are present in the schooling system do not actually portray their living (Lynch 2004). Another important factor is that many of the children of the gay parents do not consider the living of their parents as an issue but they believe that it is the discrimination and bias of the society that is more problematic for them. This can all be avoided if the gay marriages are legalized and their family units are recognized so that a person can opt for what he thinks is right for him and the family unit lives normally (LeMasters 2000). A few researches conducted have also proved to uphold the fact that gays should be allowed to marry owing to the involvement of genetics in this sexual behavior of human beings. These researches indicate a very important and interesting fact that like other traits that a human being is born with, the homosexuals are also born with this trait. The impact of genes in this factor of homosexuality was proved with many findings which upheld the fact that the part of the brain which was related to sexual relationships was different in both the gays and the heterosexual individuals. Another important finding was that there was a very high chance that the identical twin of a gay would also be a homosexual as compared to a non-identical one. A Human Rights Campaign issued an interesting statement with regard to this research claiming that “when people learn that homosexuality is not a choice, they will be more willing to treat us as equal members in society.” Thus it can be seen that like other traits that a person is born with, homosexuality is also an inborn trait like race and gender. The way that the differences in races and genders are identified, this change in the sexual pattern of human beings should also be recognized and the gays should be allowed to marry (Mucciaroni & Killian 2004). The opponents of gay marriages also have important points to make. They argue that same sex marriages should not be promoted and the reasons that they explain are the researches which uphold the fact that gay marriages have very high failure rates and similar drawbacks. A normal heterosexual marriage lasts for a period of approximately 20 years on an average. On the other hand, same sex marriages have a very low comparative average with the lasting period being only one and a half years. It is argued that this low success rate has nothing to do with the discrimination that gays face in the society and this fact is upheld by a research conducted in Netherlands. In this country, same sex marriages have been legalized and the research concludes that despite of this, the same sex marriages only last for one half years there on an average. They also present a study in Netherlands which shows that the same sex couples have multiple partners which range up to 8 partners annually. Not only this, same sex marriages present with more cases of violence that in heterosexual marriages. Thus it explains that gays should not be allowed to marry as these relationships do not have any definitive future and success (Dailey). Religious groups are also against same sex marriages and they present the fact that same sex marriages violate the religious values of the society. Certain sects of Christianity have permitted these marriages but the opinion is still divided. It is also prohibited in Islam (The New York Times 2010). Most of the people who oppose same sex marriages do it on the basis of their religious and moral beliefs. Same sex marriages are believed to be against the religious norms which uphold the fact that they violate the normal rule of sexual relationships of human beings and alter the normal family life that has been always followed. Christians use the Bible as a standpoint and explain with reference to it that same sex relationships are prohibited in their religion and that it is explained in their religion that marriage is only valid between a man and a woman. Also religious scholars mark it to be morally wrong as well. They argue that marriage between a man and a woman has been followed since centuries and it cannot be replaced (Alliance Defense Fund; Dailey). The opponents of gay marriages also present the fact that it is through heterosexual relationships that the process of reproduction can actually take place. As the homosexuals lack the ability to produce children, it upholds the fact that it is not a natural and acceptable way of marriage. Children are considered to be the future of the world and thus a stop to reproduction is not acceptable. It is also seen that only a few of the same sex relation couples opt to adopt and then raise children. Thus they do not enjoy a normal living like other heterosexual couples. Also it is argued that the living of homosexuals does not promote a healthy upbringing of the children and does not present with a positive impact on them. The violence in the houses of the homosexuals along with the very high failure rate and the multiple numbers of partners that homosexuals have are disadvantages of the same sex couples. Such a living environment does not prove to be good for the raising of children and hence homosexual marriages and adoptions should not be allowed (Dailey). The number of same sex partners has increased over the past few decades. This has been accompanied by a call by the gays for the permission of marriages to validate their relationship. Different legal proceedings followed and a few states in the United States and other countries like Netherlands have granted permission to the gays to get married. The proponents of gay marriages have very strong points and their arguments prove that these marriages should be legalized. Homosexuality is an inborn trait and also the suppression of the feelings of these individuals proves to be bad for them. We have reached an era where every human being is sensible to take his decisions and stand for what he truly desires. Every human being has the right to choose what he considers best for himself. Thus a human being should not be restrained from what he actually likes for himself and gays should be able to marry. References Alliance Defense Fund. “The Homosexual Agenda: The Principal Threat to Your Religious Freedom.” Alliance Defense Fund: Defending our first liberty. Retrieved from: http://www.alliancedefensefund.org/issues/TraditionalFamily/samesexmarriage.aspx Dailey, T. J. “The Slippery Slope of Same-Sex 'Marriage.” Family Research Council. Retrieved from: http://downloads.frc.org/EF/EF04C51.pdf Freedom to Marry. “Moving Marriage Forward: Building Majority Support for Marriage.” A Report from Freedom to Marry. Retrieved from: http://www.freedomtomarry.org/resources/ Human Rights Campaign, Staff Reports. (2004) “Gay Marriage in the Courts.” The Washington Post. Retrieved from: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/nation/daily/graphics/gaymarriage_051804.html LeMasters, Carol.  (2000). 8 x 10 Glossies. The Lesbian Review of Books, 7(1), 26.  Retrieved January 24, 2011, from ProQuest Central. (Document ID: 495039041). Top of Form Lynch, J. (January 01, 2004). The Identity Transformation of Biological Parents in Lesbian/Gay Stepfamilies. Journal of Homosexuality, 47, 2, 91. Retrieved from: http://web.ebscohost.com.ezproxy.nu.edu/ehost/detail?hid=15&sid=e03362ef-e261-49d7-a120-e6c9a335e409%40sessionmgr14&vid=2 Top of Form Mucciaroni, G., & Killian, M. (January 01, 2004). Immutability, Science, and Legislative Debate Over Gay,Lesbian and Bisexual Rights. Journal of Homosexuality, 47, 1, 53. Retrieved from: http://web.ebscohost.com.ezproxy.nu.edu/ehost/detail?hid=15&sid=b1e2d368-e8ed-4ea1-819a-1ca7f678e20e%40sessionmgr14&vid=2 Bottom of Form Bottom of Form Top of Form Romero, A. P., & Williams Institute (University of California, Los Angeles. School of Law). (2007). United States. Los Angeles, CA: The Williams Institute, UCLA School of Law. Retrieved from: http://www2.law.ucla.edu/williamsinstitute/publications/USCensusSnapshot.pdf Bottom of Form “Same-Sex Marriage, Civil Unions, and Domestic Partnerships” (August 13, 2010) The New York Times. Retrieved from: http://topics.nytimes.com/top/reference/timestopics/subjects/s/same_sex_marriage/index.html Two years ago, gay couples finally won the right to tie the knot - and thousands did. But has it all turned out happily ever after? Simon Usborne meets the men and women who have said 'I do' :[1ST Edition]. (2007, November 30).The Independent,p. 2.  Retrieved January 24, 2011, from ProQuest Newsstand. (Document ID: 1390967661). Read More