Human Sexuality: The Journey from the Victorian Era to Today - Essay Example

Human Sexuality: The Journey from the Victorian Era to Today Sexuality involves “the feelings and activities connected with a person’s sexual desires”1 or “someone’s ability to experience or express sexual feelings.”2 In other words, it is their capacity to respond to someone they are attracted to, usually the opposite sex, and have erotic experiences. It is based on gender identity as a male, female, both, neither or in between and their sexual orientation. Sexuality involves cultural, political, legal and philosophical aspects and includes issues of morality, ethics, theology, spirituality or religion and their relation to things sexual. It is governed by implied and accepted societal rules of behaviour. Human sexuality is extremely complex, complicated and incomprehensible and profoundly influences human behaviour. A Victorian female’s perceived general profile was that of a meek, docile, inhibited and pliable sexual object, indeed a sexual receptacle, for providing pleasure to husbands, procreating, child rearing and unquestioningly performing household chores, supposedly without having any needs or preferences of her own – a chattel. A woman’s worth lay in her chastity and confining herself to conjugal acts, when necessary. John S. Haller, Jr., and Robin M. Haller’s views that sexual promiscuity was an “ominous indication of national decay and not a sign of liberation”3 succinctly express the prevalent mainstream societal attitude towards female sexuality. However, preachings and expectations cannot completely douse feelings. The same sexual feelings in females must have existed, but remained repressed and were not allowed to find expression or outlet. With this as the backdrop, D.H. Lawrence’s Lady Chatterley’s Lover has an intriguing history. Paradoxically, though written in the UK in 1928, it was not until 1960 that it was published there and banned. The story is supposed to be influenced by Lawrence’s own unhappy domestic life with his domineering and aggressive wife. Though it may titillate the reader, it cannot be considered a great novel. It is nowhere near his Women in Love4 and The Rainbow5 and it seems to tip towards incoherence at moments of extreme sensual, almost graphic, imagery. There lies a paradox in the book: it is, at the same time, modern, indeed ultra-modern for the time, and Victorian. It must be remembered that it was written towards the end of the 1920s, a decade which witnessed a significant amount of literary experimentation. The decade opened with the radical novel Ulysses. However, Lady Chatterley’s Lover has not only profoundly influenced the way modern writers have written about sex, and sex can no longer be ignored as a crucial element in human lives, but has also raised censorious hackles across the English-speaking world. The story revolves around a married young woman, Lady Constance Chatterley, her paralysed and impotent husband, Clifford Chatterley, a minor nobleman who owns mines, and a working-class man, Oliver Mellors, their gamekeeper. Constance’s pent up sexual frustration draws her into an affair with Mellors. Before her marriage, Constance is an intellectual and a progressive woman from a Scottish bourgeois family. She is introduced to love affairs before her marriage and matures into a sensual woman. After marriage, she assumes Clifford’s title and becomes Lady Chatterley. After the honeymoon, her husband is sent to the war and returns paralysed waist down, and impotent. He becomes a successful writer and many intellectuals flock to their mansion. She realises she cannot live with the mind alone, she must be physically alive too. She becomes disenchanted with her weak, ineffectual husband and moves away from the cold world of intelligentsia and aristocracy into a world of sensuality and sexual fulfilment. A nurse is engaged to look after the handicapped Clifford. Connie has a brief unsatisfying affair with a visiting playwright, Michaelis. Connie starts yearning for human contact and is overwhelmed by a deep sense of despair. The distance between the husband and wife grows and she develops a profound physical aversion to him. The void in her life sucks Mellors into it. Mellors is aloof and derisive. Yet, Connie is curiously attracted by his grace and innate natural sensuality. Mellors maintains a distance between them by reminding her of the class distance between them. However, by chance, they meet at a hut in the forest and the inevitable happens, they have sex. Although this happens several times, she remains profoundly separate from him, despite their physical closeness. “One day, Connie and Mellors meet by coincidence in the woods, and they have sex on the forest floor. This time, they experience simultaneous orgasms. This is a revelatory and profoundly moving experience for Connie; she begins to adore Mellors, feeling that they have connected on some deep sensual level. She is proud to believe that she is pregnant with Mellors’ child: he is a real, ‘living’ man, as opposed to the emotionally-dead intellectuals and the dehumanised industrial workers. They grow progressively closer, connecting on a primordial physical level, as woman and man rather than as two minds or intellects.”6 While Connie is away on a holiday to Venice, Mellors’ wife returns and stirs up trouble and creates a scandal. Consequently, Mellors is fired because of the negative rumours mongered by his rancorous wife. Mellors starts divorce proceedings against his wife. In spite of Connie confessing that she is pregnant with Mellors’ baby, Clifford refuses to divorce her. The novel closes with Mellors working on a farm, waiting for the divorce to come through, and Connie staying with her sister. Both Mellors and Connie hope that ultimately they will be able to live together. Three basic issues that emerge from the novel are: the combination of Victorianism and perceived modernism, the interplay of body and mind and the social conflict. One, it employs a Victorian stylistic formality, but appears to anticipate the social morality of the late 20th century in its frank engagement with explicit subject matter and profanity. Two, the dichotomy that surfaces up between the body and the mind is fascinating, which can be gauged from Connie and Mellors’ dissatisfaction with their previous relationships, i.e., Connies’s lack of intimacy with her husband, who is ‘all mind’, and Mellors’ choice to live apart from his wife, due to her ‘brutish’ sexual nature. These dissatisfactions lead them into a relationship based upon tenderness, physical passion and mutual respect. As the relationship between them develops, they learn more about the interrelation of the mind and the body – she learns that sex is more than a shameful and disappointing act and he learns about the spiritual challenges that come from physical love. And, three, the most obvious social contrast in the plot is the affair of an aristocratic woman with a working-class man. If we look at the movie and book reviews of Lady Chatterley’s Lover at two different points of time, 1959 and 1991, respectively, we find interesting views as to how ideas regarding sexuality inform the text, and the text in turn movie, and how these ideas may sit with contemporaneous ones. The movie review (1959) says that “The story of ‘Lady Chatterley’s Lover’ is of a tense and inhibited lady who has an awakening affair with an uninhibited gamekeeper on her husband’s estate, primarily because her husband has been crippled and rendered impotent. And this is essentially the story that is told in the film. “But it certainly does not present adultery as desirable or acceptable. It presents it as a fateful expedient to which a love-starved woman is impelled, partly by her own natural urging and partly by the knowledge that her husband wants her to bear him an heir. He indicates no repugnance to the fact that it must be the child of another man. “However, he is outraged and indignant when he eventually learns that she has had a secret affair with the gamekeeper and that she is to bear this man’s child. He had assumed and expected that it would be the child of a man of his social class. Even so, he adamantly refuses to give his wife a divorce, and thus he unintentionally drives her to leave him and go to live with the man she has come to love. Obviously this is in the pattern of all those grim domestic dramas of the past in which the pitiable wife who transgresses is put through an emotional punishment.”7 The book review (1991) says that “D. H. Lawrence’s novel ‘Lady Chatterley’s Lover’, first published in 1928 and banned in England until 1960 (and in the United States until 1959), created a sensation with its frank depiction of sex. The novel, however, was not merely a portrait of ‘the warm blood-sex that establishes the living and revitalising connection between man and woman’. It was also a searing indictment of post-World War I England, providing both a fierce, disturbing portrait of a sterile society undermined by industrialism and class-bound conventions and a plea for its regeneration through passion and a return to nature. “Robert Roper’s new novel, “The Trespassers” (after an early Lawrence novel called ‘The Trespasser’), baldly steals the plot of ‘Lady Chatterleys Lover’: the book jacket goes so far as to proclaim it a ‘brilliant retelling of one of the great masterpieces of 20th-century literature’… Unfortunately, as depicted by Mr. Roper, Bascombe comes across as a hapless and self-absorbed hippie who speaks in cloying, ridiculous phrases. “Indeed, Mr. Roper’s attempts to emulate Lawrence’s lush symbolism and florid, heavy-breathing prose result in embarrassingly mawkish passages that make the reader cringe. Such language seems inappropriate, even comical in the mouths of modern-day Californians, and it underscores some of the larger conceptual problems Mr. Roper faced in deciding to update ‘Lady Chatterley’s Lover’. “Whereas Lawrence’s vivid depiction of sex was startling in 1928, similar descriptions today are commonplace, even banal; the violation of class lines represented by a wealthy woman taking up with a man supposedly her social inferior has also lost the power to shock.”8 To contextualise the discussion of Victorianism and modernism and put it in perspective, it would be appropriate to consider the comparison of the ‘advice’ given in 1894 and today to females about conjugal sex by White9, published in The Sun. In Victorian times, sex was seen as ‘at best revolting and at worst rather painful’. Vicar’s wife, Mrs Ruth Smythers, penned her book, Sex Tips for Husbands and Wives, to help young women facing ‘the terrible experience of sex’ for the first time. However, in stark contrast, Holly Hollenbeck’s modern-day Sex Lives of Wives tells women to have as much great sex as possible and to fulfil their innate sexual needs. 1894: Give little, give seldom and above all, give grudgingly THE wise bride will permit a maximum of two brief sexual experiences weekly – and as time goes by, she should make every effort to reduce this frequency. Feigned illness, sleepiness and headaches are among her best friends in this matter. MOST men are by nature rather perverted, and if given half a chance, would engage in quite a variety of the most revolting practices, including performing the normal act in abnormal positions, mouthing the female body and offering their own vile bodies to be mouthed in turn. A SELFISH and sensual husband can easily take advantage of his wife. One cardinal rule of marriage should never be forgotten: Give little, give seldom and above all give grudgingly. Otherwise, what could have been a proper marriage could become an orgy of sexual lust. JUST as she should be ever alert to keep the quantity of sex as low as possible, the wise bride will pay equal attention to limiting the kind and degree of sexual contacts. MANY men obtain a major portion of their sexual satisfaction from the peaceful exhaustion immediately after the act is over. Thus, the wife must ensure that there is no peace in this period for him to enjoy. Otherwise, he might be encouraged to soon try for more. A WISE wife will make it her goal never to allow her husband to see her unclothed body and never allow him to display his unclothed body to her. MANY women have found it useful to have thick cotton nightgowns for themselves and pyjamas for their husbands – they need not be removed during the sex act. Thus, a minimum of flesh is exposed. ONCE in bed, the wife should turn off all the lights and make no sound to guide her husband in her direction, lest he take this as a sign of encouragement. WHEN he finds her, she should lie as still as possible. Bodily motion could be interpreted as sexual excitement by the optimistic husband. Sex, when it cannot be prevented, should be practised only in total darkness. DO not encourage him – nudity, talking about sex, reading stories about sex, viewing photographs and drawings depicting or suggesting sex are the obnoxious habits the male is likely to acquire, if permitted. IF he attempts to kiss her on the lips, she should turn her head slightly so that the kiss falls harmlessly on her cheek instead. If he lifts her gown and attempts to kiss her any place else, she should quickly pull the gown back in place, spring from the bed and announce that nature calls her to the toilet. IF the husband attempts to seduce her with lascivious talk, the wise wife will suddenly remember some trivial non-sexual question to ask him. SHE will be absolutely silent while he is huffing and puffing away – she will lie perfectly still and never, under any circumstances, grunt or groan while the act is in progress. AS soon as the husband has completed the act, the wise wife will start nagging him about various minor tasks she wishes him to perform on the morrow. CLEVER wives are ever on the alert for new and better methods of denying and discouraging the amorous overtures of the husband. Arguments, nagging, scolding and bickering prove very effective, if used in the late evening, about an hour before the husband would normally commence his seduction. BY their tenth anniversary, many wives have managed to complete their child-bearing and have achieved the ultimate goal of terminating all sexual contacts with the husband. By this time, she can depend upon his love for the children and social pressures to hold the husband in the home.  2008: Initiate sex with your husband, exude enthusiasm and tune in INITIATE sex – taking the lead will encourage him to reciprocate and when he has been pleased, the standard of care we will receive in all departments will dramatically improve. EXUDE tremendous enthusiasm for sex and have it as often as possible. Try never to say no and do not start thinking or talking about other chores or problems during it. CREATE variety – make love as a ‘lady’, then next time, play it nasty as a ‘tramp’. Alternate the pace – sometimes fast and frantic, sometimes slow and romantic, using different sound effects, including sexy compliments breathlessly uttered, pleasurable moans and sighs and nasty encouragements. LOVE his private part – you will reap astonishing results by fully appreciating and loving the male genitalia. Touch it, stroke it, play with it, use your mouth on it … Love it like your pet! COMPLIMENT his technique – tell him what you love about his body, his touch and technique. Constantly encourage him during sex and this will make him happy to oblige you. BE assertive about what you want, taking care that any ideas do not come across as criticism. Try incorporating what you would like him to do by working the suggestions into the details of a story. Describe how hot such action would make you or your character in the story feel. TELL him your fantasies – use your imagination to create a variety of moods, scenes and fantasies in the bedroom. Tell him a dirty story or try some role plays – doctor/nurse, hotel guest/French maid, teacher/student, hooker/client, celebrity/fan, knight/damsel in distress, etc. Try a different one every time you have sex. PUT lots of effort into looking sexy – give him advance warning by showing him the lingerie earlier in the day and offering to model it for him later, or have him come with you to buy some new ‘bedroom attire’. KNOW what turns you on – your desire will heighten his. Good things for women include having an ear sucked, a foot rubbed, leaning on a vibrating washing machine during the spin cycle and feeling the spray of a pulsating showerhead. TUNE in to what he loves and share it with him – if he likes watching sexy movies, suggest watching one together. Visit a bookshop and choose some erotic stories you can read to each other, surf the web with him and share ‘chats’. VENTURE outside the bedroom and seek unusual locations for sex. Have a mental fixation on the sensation – focus only on his and your pleasure. TELL him an erotic story – it’s one of the greatest mood-enhancing techniques out there. Talking dirty during foreplay and sex will focus his mind and yours. RECREATE the good times – think back to what you used to do for him that he liked and do it again. Recreate the first time you had sex or take him on a second honeymoon. To conclude, historically, the sexual revolution/liberation can be traced back to early 1900s. This was apparently prompted by Sigmund Freud and Alfred Kinsey’s writings on psychosexual issues, Simone De Beauvoir’s works, sexually charged feminism of Erica Jong and Germaine Greer, Masters and Johnson’s surveys and books, among countless other factors, which led to the emancipation of the female and challenged the social outlook and traditional codes of behaviour related to sexuality and interpersonal relations, which included sex outside traditional heterosexual and monogamous relationships. The literature of a period truly reflects the general sexual mores, ethos and practices, including exceptions thereof, of that era. There have always been different sexual mores for and expected sexual behaviours from females. Sexual mores have invariably been tilted in favour of males and against females. History bears literary testimony to the inconceivably phenomenal metamorphosis in the nature and purpose of sexuality from the Victorian era to the modern day. Then, sexuality was frowned down upon as depravity and sin, in the form of fornication, adultery, aberration, etc. Today, in contradistinction to such beliefs, live-in relationships are common and accepted, gays are beginning to assimilate in the society and people have almost forgotten the word sin in the sexual context. The continuum of social mores being reflected in literature and literature influencing the mores is dynamic. It is not that only one influences the other. It is a two-way, often nebulous, process. What was taboo in the Victorian era is now, or becoming, accepted practice. What was profanity then is now, or becoming, common parlance. Today, everything goes. Literature now contains any and every word. Pornography is rampant. The Internet is infested with such sites. If a Victorian were to be here now, s/he would perhaps have died of shock! Bibliography 1. Crowther, Bosley. “Lady Chatterley; ‘Controversial’ Movie Has Premiere Here.” New York Times: July 11, 1959. Print. 2. Haller, John S., Jr., and Robin M. Haller. The Physician and Sexuality in Victorian America, 2nd ed. Urbana: University of Illinois Press, 1974. Print. 3. Kakutani, Michiko. “Books of The Times; Lady Chatterley and the Hippie”. New York Times: November 24, 1992. Print. 4. Lawrence, D.H. Women in Love. New York: Privately Printed by Thomas Seltzer. 1920. Print. 5. Lawrence, D.H. The Rainbow. 1st ed. London: Methuen & Co. 1915. Print. 6. SparkNotes Editors. “SparkNote on Lady Chatterley’s Lover.” SparkNotes LLC. n.d.. http://www.sparknotes.com/lit/ladychatterley/ (accessed April 30, 2011). 7. “The Sexual Revolution of the Sixties.” Sexuality and Modernity. 1996. http://www.isis.aust.com/stephan/writings/sexuality/revo.htm. (accessed April 30, 2011). 8. “Victorian Sexuality.” Sexuality and Modernity. 1996.http://www.isis.aust.com/stephan/writings/sexuality/vict.htm. (accessed April 30, 2011). 9. White, Ellie. “Sex Tips for Wives in 1894 and Today.” The Sun. 21 Oct 2008. http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/woman/article1833968.ece. (accessed April 30, 2011). 10. Wikipedia contributors. “Human sexuality.” Wikipedia, The Free Encyclopedia. Wikipedia, The Free Encyclopedia, 25 Apr. 2011. Web. 2 May. 2011. 11. Wikipedia contributors. “Sexual revolution.” Wikipedia, The Free Encyclopedia. Wikipedia, The Free Encyclopedia, 24 Apr. 2011. Web. 2 May. 2011. 12. Sexuality - The Ideology Of Romantic Love In The West. (accessed April 30, 2011). Read More