The Perfect Familial Relationship - Essay Example

What Constitutes as Real Happiness in the Family There are different perspectives on why some families can remain happy and for how long. People maywonder if there is a limited time to that and what exactly accomplishing being content requires. Arent You Happy for Me? by Richard Bausch and another book The Child Who Raised Poisonous Snakes by Can Xue help in trying to clear this out somewhat. Bausch’s story is about a family consisting of the parents and their only daughter called Melanie. Her parents have decided to divorce each other when she calls them to inform that she is pregnant and getting married to her sixty-three year old Professor. Jack, her father, over reacts and is offensive to his future son-in-law. He does not want his daughter to get into a marriage such as that though later we find that he acts like that because he wanted to avoid discussing his own problems and also as he worried that Melanie’s marriage may end up like his. Xue’s piece is – there is no other word for it – strange. It is also about a wife and a husband and their son called Sha-yaun. They are a Chinese family. The couple seems alright in the beginning, their son a bit odd. Sha-yaun has a fondness for snakes and sees them everywhere, but later one realises they are just symbolizing dreams. His parents are concerned for him and the feeling grows even more when he starts appearing with snake bites on his arms. They try to keep their eye on him but fail to do so properly. The boy goes through several changes in his life whilst growing up but the snakes/dreams continue though later he says that he has snakes in his stomach so his parents cannot see them i.e. he can easily mask his fears. His parents start to get weaker by the day until his mother stops acknowledging Sha-yaun as her child, wondering whether he was just a figment of her imagination or not. Again, this is a metaphor of sorts. When he grows old enough to take care of him, his parents await death as their main aim of life has been accomplished. They wanted the perfect life for their child but that never happened, maybe that fictional life is what she thinks to be nonexistent. Both the stories do not have the perfect familial relationship shown in them, in fact, it is quite the opposite though there are glimpses to a happy past, that all was not bad, they did actually have some good times. In Arent You Happy for Me? Jack and his wife have clearly been married for over twenty years before they decide on divorcing each other. Melanie had left them some time ago for her education so they did not have the excuse of staying together for the sake of their only child. They must have been happy with each other, must have been content with their life that they managed to make it as a couple for over two decades. It shows that they had liked, maybe even loved each other a lot and had been happy except now it had died out. If the parents go along well, they can bring up their children properly and without any negative feelings. Though, in the end, both Jack and Mary seem to be reminiscing about the good old times. There were certainly certain happy memories they both had and it is possible but highly doubtful that they may just reconcile. Even in The Child Who Raised Poisonous Snakes, Sha-yaun’s parents seem to be great with each other. There is not mention of any arguments; in fact, they take out time to spend with their only son, to look after him. They are both anxious about his fascination with snakes and try to do something about it. There is a sense of teamwork even though the narrator barely quotes his father, the mother doing most of the talking. “When we got home, we stayed up nights to prevent his sneaking away again.” (Pg 4) There is togetherness about them shown throughout the story. If they were not so understanding of each other, helping the other out, their son may have turned out to be worse. Jack’s relationship with his daughter is quite obvious. He adores her too much to pain her by telling her about her parents’ divorce. "The truth was that he had news of his own to tell. Almost a week ago he and Mary had agreed on a separation. Some time for both of them to sort things out." (Pg 86) He is very worried, and rightly so, when he discovers that Melanie is expecting a child at the age of twenty-three and would be marrying a man old enough to be her grandfather! Jack tries to make her understand though he goes the wrong way, getting angry and insulting the Professor instead. He does not want his only daughter to be unhappy with her marriage the same way he is now with his. He does not want her to suffer through her own mistakes, wants to protect her and cherish her. His relationship with Mary may not seem to be working out anymore but he does love their daughter. Sha-yaun’s parents clearly love their son, going to great lengths to spare him any pain he may get from the poisonous snakes he so often comes across. “His father and I were terrified, and we were more conscious than ever not to let him out.” (Pg 1) They tried to keep an eye on him, look after him and see he came to no harm mental or physical. It did not always work out since they could not possibly intrude his thoughts and mind, they did try their best though. Their son changed continuously and yet the snakes remained. They did everything possible so that he would have a wonderful, carefree life with no problems whatsoever. When they realized that their child had grown up and did not need their guidance anymore, they waited for their death as if there was no more a purpose left to their life now. Their one child was the sole reason for their survival. Read More