Analyze a current or past relationship and create a strategy for managing it - Essay Example

Losing contact with each other, we both had strings of relationships until both of us had our families. Both of us had only one child out of our own marriages and both of us got divorced from our spouses. Twenty years later, Andy came back to visit me at my mom’s house. He just took a chance if I was there, and was surprised when I was, as I was also visiting her. It was a pleasant surprise for both of us. At first, it was awkward seeing your first love two decades later when a whole lifetime has passed in between.

We caught up with each other’s lives, but did not have enough time, since he was flying back to Australia the following day. A week later, I found a friend request on Facebook from Andy which I happily accepted. Since that time, we have spent much time chatting with each other, and even tried video-chatting a few times. Over time, we realized we were still in love with each other after all these years. Although we did not officially declare that we are once again a couple, we treat each other as if we are.

I cannot fully commit to him because I did not really believe in long distance relationships, and somehow, had doubts as to his relationship history, since he has shared that he’s been into several relationships after his divorce. I, myself, have not gone dating after my divorce, so I had several qualms about getting into a serious relationship at this point in my life. Meanwhile, I decided to enjoy what Andy and I currently have, without the complications of commitment. It is what is known in social networking sites as a relationship status of “It’s Complicated”.

Attraction Our initial attraction to each other was physical. Andy was a very handsome teenager, and was quite popular with the girls. On the other hand, I did not look bad myself, being a cheerleader and a prom queen contender. Knowing each other well as we dated exclusively in our teens, the attraction went beyond the surface. I discovered that he had a kind heart which was compassionate to others in need. He was a very good son and brother and to top it all, he had a sense of humor that complemented mine.

I admired his drive and ambition to be successful, and envied his focus and persistence in his studies. I was sure that he was a great catch and would be an ideal husband and father as well as a successful professional in the future. Andy admitted that he fell in love with my feminine ways and the way I treated my family and friends. He felt very protective over me because I was so naive. He liked the fact that I was very down-to-earth and did not waste my time on shallow things such as fashion, make-up and boys.

He loved my simplicity and the fact that I was a homebody, very skilled in cooking and home design and organization. He also thought I would make the perfect wife and mother someday. Our short term and long-term attraction factors for each other may be explained theoretically. Matlin (2008) explains gender differences in attraction partner as based on an evolutionary psychology approach. According to this approach, people’s preferences have roots in evolution where men prefer young, attractive, healthy-looking women who are likely to pass on men’s genes to the next generation.

On the other hand, women are drawn to men who are economically stable to ensure that their future children are well provided for (Matlin, 2008). Women were also found to value a partner’s ambition, industriousness and social dominance as well as emotional