Why men cheat on women - Essay Example

? Why men cheat on women? Introduction There are several reasons for men to cheat women. However, the involvement of the woman in a man’s life has a significant role in such cheating. Men, being egoistic, would not like to express their feelings, when they get hurt. Therefore, it is important for a woman to keep the man in her life, completely satisfied, emotionally and otherwise. Else, the man has a reason to cheat on his woman. Some of these reasons are elaborated below. What men desire Although, man’s desire leads to cheating, this has nothing to do with the women partners. Male hormones and upbringing is responsible for them to seek variety and novelty. However, this urge has a direct relationship with the age of man. The younger men would prefer to have romantic and sexual relation with a number of women, as they crave for different tastes. But, with the onset of maturity this desire decreases. As men desire to be liked by women, they feel that this is the way they can express their superiority, within the social circle. The urge for men, to experience the pleasure of having sex with different women, is one of the major reasons for such cheating. However, women cannot help them much, in changing such habits. Sexual compatibility The poor performance of women in bed could be the reason for men to look for another partner. Sex, being a very private and sensitive issue, needs equal and active participation by both partners. When a female partner does not feel equally excited in bedroom, the male would think her to be frigid. The romantic environment in the bed can be ruined by a woman who shows slightest hesitation, while participating in the sexual act. This cannot be compromised by the beauty of face or body, as men want the ultimate action.(Top Three Reasons Men Cheat ). Challenge satisfies male ego Men love challenges, from their early childhood. This is related to their growth in a different cultural and emotional environment. During childhood, male and female children love to play differently. While male children would be excited to win a challenging video game, female child would like to play with her doll, in a sober manner. This attitude of men relates to their male ego. During adulthood, men prefer to show their male charisma to women. This makes them seek more female partners, as the increased number of the same would mean satisfying the male ego, increasingly. Similarly, men feel more satisfied at the fact that they have the ability of attracting another female, although they try to forget the guilt of cheating involved in this act. Managing different women, in and outside the bedroom, gives men a feeling of winning the adult game that may support their self-esteem. Men also would like to boast about their ability to have multiple partners, when discussing such issues among friends.(Denio) Emotional dissatisfaction Men may not like to express it, but they expect their women folk appreciating them, while they execute different jobs in an excellent manner. Although females are supposed to be more emotional and sensitive, male species are equally sensitive. However, their ego stops them to express their feelings, particularly when they are hurt. On the other hand they feel delighted and esteemed when the women express feelings of affirmation for their male partner. Women, at the same time, are quick to understand the inner feelings of men. Hence, creating an atmosphere of mutual appreciation can work wonders for the marital relationships. Accordingly, this reason for cheating by men could be abolished, easily. (Yorio, 1) Romancing at office When men lack the emotional satisfaction, as detailed above, they seek to fill this gap, by building romantic relationship at the workplace. Since office provides the kind of atmosphere that is similar to home, in terms of association and time, men find it easier to share their feelings with a female colleague at the office. In the process, men try to attract and gain sympathy of the woman concerned. This usually results in an extra-marital relationship, which satisfies the male ego, while meeting his emotional needs. The woman at work may praise his work, while appreciating his good looks. Such body language of the female co-worker sets the man to initiate another relationship, as he would forget his wife waiting at home. Remaining attractive and appreciative is a must for the female partner to maintain the strong bondage with her male spouse. (Yorio, 2) Men seek their own space There are examples of women clinging to their husbands for all major and minor problems, on daily basis. This becomes irritating for men, who may tolerate it for a certain period. However, if such situation continues, the male partner would look for freedom from these irritations, outside the marriage. This tempts the male to think of dating other ladies. In addition, if the woman is more dominating in the married relationship, men would feel hurt. The basic instinct of every male prompts him to have some amount of independence and space for himself, which he would like to use in his own way. There are many activities that give joy to men, apart from sex and dating women. However, if the woman in his life is entirely dependent on him, all the time, then the man looses the opportunity to pursue his favorite activity. This would ultimately prove boring for the man, resulting in seeking solace from other females, outside the marriage. As men would like to be in control, they are more likely to cheat on a woman who has a dominating nature. Jealousy and suspicion are other factors, which make a man feel that his female partner has no trust in him. This feeling gives way to starting a new relationship with another woman. As women by nature are prone to being jealous and suspicious, it ruins bond of mutual trust and reliability; required for maintaining a healthy married relationship. Men, being freedom loving by nature, would find it easier to start dating other women who can trust them.(Pugh, 10) Tendency towards infidelity As a matter of fact, this tendency can be observed in both the sexes. However, men believe in seeking variety and more pleasure, as the existing relationship may prove boring for them, after a few years of marriage. As in other spheres of life, men seek to experience a variety of tastes in romance and sex. It depends on the female partner, who must try to remain attractive to her male spouse, even after several years of marriage. Sexual compatibility, being an issue, which cannot be measured and tested by any yard stick; is something, which the two partners have to achieve. Quite often a female may get bored and loose interest in the sexual part of the marriage, while male hormones may drive man to crave for regular sex. In such situations, the sexual compatibility becomes the first causality. This results in the man seeking relationship, outside of marriage, to fulfill his need. However, the urge for having frequent sex gets decreased with age. This has a direct affect on infidelity, which means that there are lesser chances of older men being infidel, than their younger counterparts. Age certainly has a balancing effect on the hormones that drive the urge for sex. Therefore, it can be presumed that older men are more prone to make a compromise to save their married life, than the younger males. Cheating is a problem that may be confronted by younger couples, more than their older counterparts.(Benson) Reasons for cheating a pretty woman Any man can easily get attracted to a beautiful woman. But the initial attraction goes away, if the female partner does not take care of his other needs. A man would get deep emotional satisfaction if the lady in his life attends to him, by being attentive to his small needs. When the female partner spends most of her time, in beauty parlors and polishing her nails at home; the man starts feeling deserted. This eventually results in men seeking fulfillment of their emotional needs, somewhere else. In addition, a pretty woman can be cunning and evil-minded, inside. This virtue of the female partner cannot remain hidden from her husband, for a long time. In the course of marriage, over the years, her true nature gives a disgusting feeling deep inside the male partner, who starts thinking for seeking another woman in his life. At the same time, there is no guarantee that a beautiful woman will prove equally good in bed. If the female partner is not able to give proper and positive responses to the male moves in bed, then her beauty is worth-less, considering the heat of that moment. Men seek perfect psychological, physical and emotional bond, while being in bed with their woman. The body language and mental responses of the female partner are most important, in this direction, for men to remain attracted to their female partners. This is truer in respect of activities involving sexual interaction. In case the female partner does not improve and try to satisfy the man, while in bed, she is definitely going to lose him, as he would most probably cheat on her.(Real reasons why men cheat on beautiful women) Temptation of the opportunity Men are hungry for more sex. An opportunity, even for a ’one-night-stand’, would brighten a male, as he starts imagining the kind of enjoyment waiting for him. Only the most honest, sincere and faithful of men would have the courage to lose such a golden chance. For example, a man gets too close to a female, during the midnight party. The result obviously would lead both of them to the bedroom, as the man cannot muster courage to say no to such an opportunity. At the same time, most men think that they can get away with such ‘short term cheating’ allegation. This may be true, also, as most women want to save their marriage. They tend to think of such happening as a bad dream and pretend forgetting the same. Women tend to look at their marriage from the ‘love’ point of view, while men give more importance to sex. However, if men show due feelings of love and romance to the woman, after utilizing the above opportunity, it is most likely that the woman in his life would forgive him. An example of such an adjustment is the case of Hillary and Bill Clinton.(ugg) When women feel sex is dirty In few conservative societies, females are brought up with the conviction that sex is a dirty thing. When such women enter into a married relationship, they carry this emotional burden with them. This certainly effects their action in the bedroom, where the woman plays a passive role, trying only in a fake manner, to satisfy her male partner’s natural sex urge. This becomes the main reason for men seeking such pleasure outside his marriage. (Schipani) Conclusion While there are many other reasons, apart from the above, cheating is a matter which needs to be resolved between the two partners. The compromise formula should be based on’ give and take’ ideology, while the female partner should make it a point to see that the bond is maintained, all along, in a healthy manner. Works Cited Benson, John. “Psychology of Infidelity: Why Men and Women Cheat”, Saludify March 1, 2013, Web, 4 May 2013 Denio, Tim. “Why Men Cheat on Women-The Hidden Reasons”. SelfGrowth.com. SelfGrowth.com, n.d. Web. 3 May 2013. Pugh, Clifton. Why Do Men Cheat?, “no city mentioned”, Clifton D. Pugh, 2011, Web, 3 May 2013 “Real reasons why men cheat on beautiful women”, Lifestyle, iamsassychic.com, 24 January, 2013, Web. 4 May 2013 Schipani, Denise. “6 Common Reasons Men Cheat” Woman’s Day. n.d. Web 4 May 2013 “Top Three Reasons Men Cheat”, Practical Happiness. 19 January, 2010. Web. 3 May, 2013. Ugg, “The Top 8 Reasons Why Men Cheat On The Women They’re With”. Ask ugg, 10 May 2007, Web. 4 May 2013 Yorio, Nicole. “The Truth About Why Men Cheat.” Men’s Health. WEB MD n.d. 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