Family as a Protector of Modern Childhood - Essay Example

Essay, Sociology Topic: Analyze the role of the family as a protector of the modern child…. Historically speaking, the head of the family has mostly been the male. But in the familial perspective, fast developments are taking place and the traditional roles of men and women are being recast and the children are subjected to new modes of governance. As a result of empowerment, women have attained financial independence and they need not depend on men. In many families they are the breadwinners and have taken charge as head of the families and have owned the responsibility of governance of children. Male has vacated the role of dominant gender in the society and the children look forward to their mother for their secular needs. In gender relations woman is the equal partner to man, if not more. The role of women has undergone quick transformation in the family and it has affected children for better or worse. Instead of staying at home to nurse children, own the entire domestic responsibility, and cook for the family without intermission, they go to work, take degrees and diplomas to enhance their academic skills in pursuit of successful careers. To bear a child is the nature-ordained responsibility of a woman, and in case of a working woman, she is expected to return to her place of duty as early as practicable. Normally a woman gets three months’ paid maternity leave. If the career of the woman happens to be more lucrative as compared to the man, the family equations change. If one of them has to resign from the service, or go on long leave paid or unpaid, it is the turn of the man to take up the domestic responsibility, tending the child, cook the dinner and do other allied domestic jobs. The caricature of love, family and parental role is thus recast and the children look forward to the father, as his presence is for a longer duration before them in the domestic environment, as compared to the mother. Amidst the cluster of issues like change in societal structure, cultural and social interactions due to the impact of materialistic civilization and technological advancement, movements for gender equality, the children are at the receiving end and their interests are not appreciated and taken care of by parents, the custodians of politics, culture, religion and the print and electronic media. Most importantly, denial of parental love and lack of cordiality in the familial relationships is their profound loss. Children born outside the institution of marriage Children born impacted by the societal values of the materialistic civilization are not aware of the load of responsibilities they have to carry throughout their life for which they are not responsible. Ellen Key writes, “People have commenced already to experiment with unions outside of marriage. People are looking for new forms for the common life between man and women” (7).The question worth pondering is, men and women have exercised their right of freedom. But how that will affect their children? Does it have the potency to injure their rights and can they command respect in the society as they grow up? Will the children thank the parents for the benign inheritance, or condemn them for their rash act? Ellen Key mentions the consequences of the above-mentioned free union of men and women without the label of marriage, thus: “The duty and responsibility towards the children will be all the more strict as society learns to regard it as one of its principle duties to hinder all thoughtless and undeserved suffering” (43). Advancement in the field of genetic science have endowed unimaginable prowess to the living choice of a woman that she can live without the man for the entire span of her life and she can boast it as her truly liberated, personal life. Without physically copulating, she can bear as many children as she wants. Has this new found freedom for women contributed to overall happiness of woman, man and children? Taking into consideration the ground realities and the current societal conditions, the answer is in the negative. In a dysfunctional family the child is the most affected party and its mental suffering is intense in a situation caused on account of the faults of the parents and their independent mentality is ruinous to the family structure. Dysfunctional families and how they affect children The prevailing societal conditions are in a way responsible for the increasing number of dysfunctional families that have direct bearing on the growth and career of children. The dictates of the society, the economic conditions, competition amongst women once they get into the service life and their personal demands to maintain their personality to look good, to sustain the standard of living, to send children to schools to prepare them as future contributors for the welfare of society, all these adversely affect the growth of children, and affect their psyche as they are denied parental love at the right time and at the right places. A vicious circle develops with both the parents at work, with teachers and babysitters taking over the responsibilities at the formative stage of the life of children. With limited familial interactions during dinnertime, and during TV episodes, what remains of the day is fixed sleeping hours. Parents hardly have any time to emotionally interact with children. This is how the children are being trained for their entry into modern society. Ellen Key cautions against such a development and argues, “In this respect a woman has only one duty, an unmistakable one, against which every transgression is a sin, namely that the new being to which she gives life, must be born in love and purity, in health and beauty, in full mutual harmony, in a complete common will, in complete common happiness” (51).We are engaged in tall talks like individual and women freedom, gender equality etc. Parents have no quality time to spend with the children. With no perfect parental discipline, children carry on with the available discipline and they grow up with a hardened mentality devoid of love. How is it possible to imbibe in them the quality of family affection and how one can expect them to take care of their parents in old age? It is the naked truth that someone else is taking care of our children to rob a good portion of affection. The home is like the lodging and boarding house for them or to put it bluntly a barrack of the soldiers. The impressionable minds of children Lynn Spigel argues, “Since the early centuries of industrialization, children have been conceptualized as blank slates upon which parents “write” their culture (111). But things have changed much during the last fifty years or so and rapid societal changes have taken over the lives of children. Since parents are governed by the dictates of the society, they subject the children to a particular type of discipline as per the societal needs, whether it contributes to the real growth of their individual personality or not. The successful future of the children is the main concern of the parents but the procedures for success are again laid down by the society. For maintaining the social status, parents work and raising the kids does not become their prime responsibility but an ancillary job. Average middle class parents have no control over their lives and the society prepares the blueprint about the things to be done and not to be done. Parents are unable to take control or influence the consequence of events. Children are the casualty If the parents wish that their children should live in a happy society, they need to be rebel against the modern societal procedures. The modern society has confined people in an open-air prison whose doors are permanently shut. Rules, regulations and the so-called provisions of the constitution drafted by intellectuals and the so-called social thinkers have influenced and will continue to influence the direction of an individual’s life, and the navigation course is handed over to each child. A child pursues study to become an Engineer or a Doctor, not because he/she wants it, but for the monetary benefit of their future employer and they ‘kidnap’ the comforts of the student’s life, the beginning of which is made through the campus interviews. Men and women are busy with their infightings over the conflicts of the traditional roles, responsibilities thrown in the modern world, but in the process they fail to realize that they have been divested with all power and control over themselves, the environment, and the future of their children. They think that they march ahead, but their progress is at the mercy of the controlling authority. Parents do not realize that primarily the children want love, to give love and be loved. Due to the pressure of the modern civilization, security, safety, comfort for the family and the desire to love in peace is obstructed at every stage, and the children suffer most. This vicious cycle needs to be broken and it is the duty of men and women that they should collectively find a way out, to honorably retreat to the traditional mode, in the interest of their children. Women may be fiercely independent, men may stubbornly stick to their stand to the concept of male superiority, and yet they can make efforts to locate and share the area of happiness. The present times are tomorrow’s history, so it is the duty of the right thinking individuals, to be the protectors of the interests of the children in the true sense of then term. The supreme interest of the male and the female needs to be the welfare of children. Besides equality of the genders, equanimity, excellent guidance for the children and procedures to govern them with dedication are needed most. Unprecedented changes in societal/family values and their desperate effect on the children But the unprecedented television and internet revolutions have led the children to abysmal depths of moral turpitude, their childhood stands dissolved and the beautiful little race is on the verge of extinction! Neil Postman argues, “The unprecedented change in both the frequency and of child crime, as well as the legislative response to it, is no doubt attributable to multiple causes but none more cogent, I think, than that our concept of childhood is rapidly slipping from our grasp” (135-136). So what is the prevailing state of affairs? 1. With dysfunctional family, the traditional family values are on the decline. 2. With loss of family values, the children are denied love and they are directionless and destination less. 3. With dent in the structure of society, the cultural values are lost. 4. Avalanche of changes have engulfed the society, and no one knows how to check its rapid advancement. 5. Humankind, most importantly children, have reached unprecedented and unbearable moral solitude. 6. With grownup children taking up independent choices, the homes have been converted in to Old age Homes. 7. The attempted solution for one issue, gender equality, has given rise to a series of other social issues. The society is suffering for having sacrificed family centered components, in the name of advancement towards the altar of materialistic civilization. 8. The society is paying the heavy price for allowing the parents not to perform their roles of supporting, educating and nurturing the children. The importance of ‘nurturing’ is now being realized by the family/society. 9. The importance of family-oriented policies is being increasingly felt. 10. Providing emotional support to children is an important factor that cements the bonds between the members of the family. Conclusion With the broadening of the role of women, the societal structure has changed and it has affected the cultural and social interaction of the family members. The children are at the receiving end, and they do not get what they desire and deserve. The efforts for gender equality have led to the devaluation of the interests of children and they are not being paid proper attention. The children do not get justice from all sources, the parents, the government policies, the guardians of culture and religion, print and electronic media, all of them ‘exploit’ children as per their perspectives. They do not realize how their services turn out to be disservice from the point of view of children. Science, technology and rapid technological advancements continue to impact the children in numerous ways, and they are unable to provide a logical direction to the lives of children. Works Cited Key, Ellen. The Century of the Child. G. P. Putnam’s Sons, New York Postman, Neil. The Disappearance of Childhood. Delacorte Press, New York. Spigel, Lynn. Seducing the Innocent Childhood and Television in Postwar America.n.d. Read More