Marriage and the Family - Essay Example

Marriage and the Family Introduction Marriage refers to the union formed when a man and a woman decide to live together often formalized through a ritual. After the formalization of the union through either religious or traditional rituals, the two form a family, which is the basic institution in a society. The family, as the basic institution in a society plays essential roles in the sustenance of life and the longevity of the society. Several theories explain the process of creating a family and the successive occurrences that take place within the institution. Different societies have varying definitions of the institutions and therefore have laws that regulate the creation of families. Among such theories are structural functionalist, social conflict and symbolic interactionist theories all of which have varied explanations to the correlations between the partners and their societies as the discussion below portrays. As a union between to people, the society has specific rules to guide the nature of the relationship and the arrangement that people can have in order for the society to recognize such relationship as valid families. Exogamy for example is one of such laws that define marriages. Every society has specific exogamic laws, which help define the groups to marry and further outline the cultural norms of the marriages. Among such laws is the banning of a marriage between siblings. No society permits their children to marry their siblings a fundamental law that guides the development of a society. Such is a basic cultural norm that sustains the socialization within the family as people marry from different societies thereby fostering peaceful coexistence. Societies therefore have punitive laws guide sexual relations with the view of curbing the prevalence of incest in families. A nuclear family refers to an arrangement in which the partners live with their children. The arrangement permits for intensified interaction among the spouses and children thereby resulting in the development of strong cohesive families in which children trust their parents. The manifestation of such families is common in the contemporary societies in which integration within societies become more intense through such concepts as globalization and urbanization. Families in such societies continually manifest independent cultures thereby minimizing interactions with other distant relations. An extended family on the other hand refers to a living arrangement in which spouses and their children live alongside other relatives within the same locality. In such living arrangements, interaction among the relatives is intense thereby compelling the families to trade values in order to develop strong cohesive and large families. Other equally fundamental terms that help describe the composition of families include monogamy, which refers to the marriage between two partners: a male and a female. Polygamy on the other hand refers to a marriage with two or more partners. In a polygamous family, the husband has two or more wives. Different societies uphold varied beliefs on the composition of families. Regardless of the structure of a family, the institution remains vital in the creation and stability of a society. The relationship between the partners in a marriage relies on the beliefs of both the partners and the norms set by the society to guide such arrangements. Polygamies appear traditionalist owing to the prevalence of monogamy in the contemporary society. additionally, most societies have laws that govern the creation and dissolution of families with the view of minimizing harm that such arrangement nay often cause the partners. Structural functionalists investigate the relationship between the family and the society. Additionally such theorists investigate the role of the family and the importance of the union between a man and a woman as a legally and culturally recognized institution within the family. As explained earlier, the family is a vital institution within the society mandated with safeguarding the longevity and stability of societies. According to the proponents of the theory, the family performs six vital functions, which include economic production, sexual control, care of the sick and the aged, socialization of the children, sexual control and reproduction. The six are vital in the development of strong cohesive and progressive societies. When two partners begin living together formally as a wife and a husband, the need for financial security heightens owing to the need to sustain the family. This compels the two to engage in economic activities hereby becoming economically productive. This does not only help develop the two but the society as well. A family sustains decorum in the society by curbing the prevalence of sexual immorality. Through marriage, the society permits the two partners to engage in sexual relations formally. The approved mating arrangements seek to minimize sexual immorality thereby develop ideal societies in which people have sexual relations with their legal partners. This helps create a perfect society with minimal sexually transmitted diseases besides reduced conflicts that would otherwise arise, as people would definitely compete for mates. Additionally, the family institution provides children a conducive platform for the children to interact and socialize among themselves thereby tightening their relationships (Wendy, Monica & Peggy, 2007). Children safeguard the future of the society, the family institution therefore provides them with a love-filled environment where they grow and borrow the societal values. This helps foster the growth of peaceful and cohesive societies. Furthermore, the approved mating arrangements with the formalized union of two partners in a family provide the two with the permission to copulate and reproduce. Reproduction is a vital function that safeguards the future of the society. Additionally, the living arrangements create a conducive environment in which the parents care for their children. in the same measure, the family helps care for both the sick and the aged thereby securing the social security of the partners in a family. When the two partners get older and weaker, their children begin caring for them. Social security is vital in the development of safe secure societies. Children take over such ensuring that their parents have high quality lives even in their old age. Functionalists assert that the family helps create stability in the society through the formation of alliances. Such taboos as incest compel people to socialize as they search for mates beyond their families, with marriages, people form strong alliances thereby sustaining the safety and security in the entire society. Furthermore, the existence of specific laws such exogamy compels children to look for mates beyond their families and societies especially in traditional tribal societies (Abigail, 2013). This compels societies to interact thereby fostering social integration within societies a feature that contributes to the development of peace and stability among societies. Through marriages, strange families form strong alliances as such families become relations thereby begin fostering formidable social alliances. Additionally, the theorists explain the advantages and disadvantages of both the nuclear, and extended family arrangements. Nuclear families are small and compact with the partners relating closely with their children. Structuralisms explain that such arrangement explain that the living arrangements result in emotional overload in such compact families. Small families are convenient and create conducive environments for the growth and development of both the children and the parents (Beauvoir, 1953). However, the children acquire poor interpersonal skills and may even fail to acquire the social values shared communally as is the case in extended families where relatives share for each other communally including the development of the children. Additionally, the minimal emotional pressure helps hasten the development of the family members. Social conflict theorists on the other hand investigate the types of conflicts that exist in families. The theorists observe that the conflicts are likely to spill over to the society thereby creating social disturbance. This implies that leaders should have ways of remedying such conflicts in time before they affect the peace and stability of the society. Among the sources of conflict especially in contemporary societies are the division of house chores and the salaries of each of the partners among many others (Lamanna & Riedmann, 2005). House chores are both numerous and varied depending on the social and family structures. Couples often quarrel over the division of such works with some societies labeling most of the work as female roles. However, effective social structures should have effective ways of labeling such chores in order to cushion either partner from overburdening the other with such chores. The division of house chores is a domestic affair that the partners share among themselves depending on their understanding. However, the concept of patriarchy creates a social structure in which men dominate over their female counterparts. Through such cultural structures, the society splits the works based on the gender roles. In most cases, the men help their wives in performing some of the house chores with the proponents of the social conflict their positing that men who love their families will always help in house chores. The division of the chores further relies on the level of engagement of the couples. In cases where both partners have their formal employment, the division of the chores is essential in the determination of peace in the family thereby contributing to the stability of the society. In most cases, such partners solicit the services of a house helps thereby reducing the pressure of the chores. The other major cause of conflicts in families is the salaries that couples earn especially in cases where both partners have sources of income. The failure for the two to develop a structure of sharing the financial responsibilities causes conflicts as the partners begin feeling exploited. The situation becomes worse in cases where the wife earns more than the husband does especially in the patriarchal societies in which the men consider themselves superior to the women (Althusser, 1971). Such cases affect the ego of the man as the women may become superior over them. Social conflict theorists therefore posit that the level of peace and stability of a family relies on the relationship and communication between the couples (Auerbach, 1953). Their private arrangement helps them minimize such conflict. The theorists observe that the inability to solve such conflicts may deteriorate the stability of the society. Internal family conflicts affect different people within both the family and the society depending on the nature of the conflicts. Among the first group of people who suffer from such conflicts are the children (O’Hanlon, 1994). The children are part of the family and therefore whenever the two parents fight they are always in the middle and stand to suffer in case of any eventuality. In case of a separation, the future of the children remains uncertain, as they are likely to miss the love of both their parents. The rise of such children contributes to the instability in the society owing to the portrayal of lack of social values and the lack of trust in the family institution. The children learn from their parents and make personal decisions that later influence their relationships with their own spouses (White, 2013). The proponents of the theory therefore advise that the society should try solving some of the problems in order to cushion the breakage of families since such portray failures in some of the basic institutions within the family. Symbolic interaction theory is yet another theory that attempts to explain the formation of the family institution and the types of conflicts that arise in the institution. The theory investigates the effects of personal experiences that each partner has and the effects of such experiences. In most cases, personal experiences influence the relationship between the two often contributing to the manifestation of conflicts in the family. While childhood experiences influence the stability of families, such experiences help influence the selection of mates. This implies that people select their perfect matches since people are likely to consider various factors before selecting a wife. However, after the formation of the family, persona experiences of the two further affect the nature of the relationship possibly contributing to either the peace or instability in the family. Such factors as pressures from work are likely to manifest themselves in the family possibly instigating conflicts in the family. Just as discussed above, house chores help, portray the extent of conflicts in the family. At the time of marriage, the two partners share most of the chores owing to the love that exists at the time. However, as time progresses the trend begins to change with most males adopting the patriarchal beliefs thereby leaving most of the house chores to the women (Linstone & Turoff, 1975). The proponents of the theory observe that men who earn less than their wives are less likely to help with household chores and so are the men without jobs. Men who are happy with both their jobs and pay help their wives and often either work alongside their women or do most of the house chores. In retrospect, the family is among the most fundamental institutions in the society and therefore requires effective regulation in order to enhance the peace and stability of the society. As the basic unit in the society, people inherit the social values as taught by the families. This implies that a discord in the family has far-reaching effects in the stability of the family possibly influencing the stability and cohesiveness of the entire society. References Abigail, O. (2013). ‘The Power and Limits of Marriage: Married Gay Mens Family Relationships’. Journal of Marriage and Family. 75: 191-205. ProQuest. Althusser, L. (1971). Lenin and Philosophy: And Other Essays. Trans. Ben Brewster. New York: Monthly Review Press. Auerbach, E. (1953). Mimesis: The Representation of Reality in Western Literature. Princeton, NJ: Princeton University Press. Beauvoir, S. (1953). The Second Sex. Tr. H.M. Parshley. New York: Knopf. Lamanna, M. A & Riedmann, A. (2005). Marriages & Families: Making Choices in a Diverse Society: Making Choices and Facing Change. New York: Cengage Learning.  Linstone, H., & Turoff, M. (1975). The Delphi method: Techniques and applications. London: Wesley. Minuchin, S. (1998). Where is the family in narrative family therapy? Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, 24, 397405. O’Hanlon, W. (1994). The third wave. The Family Therapy Networker; 18, 18-29. Wendy, M. D., Monica, L. A & Peggy, G. C. 2007). ‘The Changing Institution of Marriage: Adolescents Expectations to Cohabit and to Marry’. Journal of Marriage and Family 69 (3): 559-575. White, J. M. ‘The current status of theorizing about families’. In G. W. Peterson & Bush, K. R. (Eds.). 2013. Handbook of marriage and the family. NY: Springer Science+ Business Media. Read More