Cultural Family Background - Coursework Example

Cultural Family Background Culture is an important aspect of every individual. Members of a particular community have distinct features that uniquely identify them. These features may include visible components such as clothing as well invisible components like language and behavior. In essence, culture is a set of distinct features that define a community. The cultural background of a person is vital in helping to indicate the values and features that have been passed on by the previous generations. The propagation of culture from generation to generation helps to transmit knowledge and sustain the important values of the community. Every community has a set of values that define the way that its members relate with each other and handle conflicts. Therefore, one’s cultural background is critical in order to appreciate the various features of his or her community and understand his or her family background. A significant portion of the United States’ population originated from different countries and thus families have unique cultural backgrounds. This paper will evaluate my family’s origins and its cultural roots. Further, I will discuss the effects of my cultural background on my personality and its effect on our family patterns. My family’s cultural background originates from both Dutch and Irish cultures. According to the records that my parents kept, their great grandfathers emigrated to the United States of America in the 1800s. This implies that my family’s generations have stayed in the United States for the about two centuries. It is significant that from my grandfather, none of my family members has ever lived in our ancestral homes. Thus, my Irish and Dutch cultures are more assimilated into American culture and not necessarily a replica of the traditional cultures in our ancestral homes. My father is not very much informed about our culture and he prefers the modern American way of life. It was difficult to obtain information from him regarding our culture and this presented an initial challenge in my endeavor to investigate our cultural background. My Irish roots are the most fascinating to me as I have always identified with the Irish culture. One of the notable aspects of Irish culture is the way in which children are reared. The culture upholds morality in the society and children are taught the value of being virtuous and respectful (Gleeson, 2010). Bad behavior is not condoned at all in the Irish culture and parents may use punishment to deter children from engaging in vices. I believe the strict upbringing that I went through played an important role in defining my character. I remember that my mother used to be very strict and we had to complete our assigned duties at all times without failure. According to (McGodrick, 2005) Irish families rarely praise or give children much attention due to the fear that it may lead to deviant behavior. In fact, my mother thought that praising children would make them to lose focus and discipline. Her praises were so rare such that when they came along, I would celebrate. As siblings, we would strive to outdo each other in terms of executing the duties assigned to us and behave very well as we knew the consequences of not doing so were dire.. Irish families lack tight connections of family members. Notably, extended families are not close and they do not have the obligation to support each other (Casey, 2009). When I was growing up, we would only visit my Uncle and cousins once in a year. Even during the visits, we were never that close and I would keep distance from my cousins. Effectively, I grew up with no tight relationships with my extended family as they were like strangers. The distance between us and the extended family meant that we had to independent and self reliant. However, I believe that family is an important component for every human being. Thus, it is important that one should have close relationships with members of the extended family and support them. I feel that my childhood would have been more fulfilling if I had close relationship with my cousins. We grew up in such a distant way that we are like strangers to each other. The Irish culture takes religion very seriously and it is a critical element for every family. Specifically, the Catholic Church serves as a national aspect of the religious culture among Irish people. Religion is an intrinsic part of the Irish culture and most families steadfastly hold on to the Church as a unifying factor (Casey, 2011). During my early life, our activities used to revolve around our local Catholic Church Parish. It was compulsory for me to attend the early morning prayers as well as the evening prayers at the Parish. As noted previously, the strictness of my mother meant that I could not miss the church services. I also attended Catholic schools and thus the religious activities were more or less part of my childhood. I believe that being forced to go to church made me to resent religion and church related activities. Once I was away from home, I never attended church services. Even in my adulthood, I no longer go to church due to the resentment I hold against it. My parents are still staunch Catholics and they hold the Irish believe that things go wrong as a result of sins.(DeMaster & Giordano, 2005) According to (McGodrick, 2005), Irish mothers rule their families. Research indicates that Irish culture is more of matriarchal society where women control the family. One of the key roles of a mother in the Irish culture is to offer religious guidelines to the family. Mothers are supposed to be morally upright and strictly follow religious teachings. My mother was very firm on matters relating to church. For instance, going for church events and services was not a matter of choice for me and my siblings. My mother also presided upon prayers in our house and she taught us to pray before retiring to sleep. Mothers are also expected to be selfless and put a brave face in the public. Even if the family may undergo turmoil and challenges, the Irish culture emphasizes that women should always remain resolute. In my experiences, Irish culture holds women more highly than men. Irish fathers are rarely involved in the day to day running of the family and it is the mothers who manage the family (Casey, 2009). My father used to work as lawyer and he was never engaged in our activities. It is my mother who would monitor my behavior, ensure I completed my homework and talk with my teachers in case I had problems at school. The role of women in the Irish culture extends beyond being mothers. Unmarried women are still held in high esteem in the Irish culture as long as they are of a good moral standing (Anderson, 2004). The unmarried women serve as important components of the Irish families by assisting their married counterparts as well as their married brothers. In my family, my unmarried aunt from my mother’s side used to take care of us during childhood. In the absence of my mother, she was the de facto head of the family and she ensured that the family operated smoothly. Even in adulthood, she played an important of giving advice to me and mediating whenever I had conflicts with my mother. The tenacity and formidability of Irish women helps to ensure that families stay together and work towards a common goal. The use of alcohol is tolerated in the Irish culture. Alcohol is included in most Irish celebrations and most adults consume alcohol. It should be noted that Irish men drink more in comparison to the women. This is because women are supposed to be strong and lead their families. In the Irish culture, the consumption of alcohol is appreciated for its ability to make people merry and solve their problems. Alcohol is said to help cure colds, reduce pain and ease grief. Therefore, the culture celebrates alcohol in the society. Further, (Casey, 2011) argues that the Irish are livelier and engaging when they are drunk. Due to the fact the fact that most Irish men are reserved and shy, alcohol helps them to overcome these inhibitions. Suffice to say, the altered state of mind attained by consuming alcohol gives people the bravado to engage in actions that would not do when sober. My father used to be a moderate drinker and would not bring alcohol to our home. However, he became a perpetual drunkard when he lost his job. He would drink excessively and then turn violent at home; sometimes forcing us to take refuge at our neighbor’s house. I hated alcohol as I felt that it impaired judgment and destroyed people’s ability to be civil. The fact that Irish people are white made it easy for them to blend in with the dominant American population (Chan et al, 2011). Because of this, our family was not subject to any racial discrimination. Our names were of an American origin and this helped us to be considered as Americans. However, our cultural commitment to the Catholic religion made us to be different from most of our neighbors. Children used to ridicule us at school due to the fact that we were Roman Catholics while most of them were Protestants. The religious ridicule was intense since the children would make fun of the rosary that I used to wear. I went through religious discrimination during childhood and it negatively affected my self worth. Irish culture is basically conservative and leans towards traditional family values. Gender identities and gender roles are tend towards the traditional views of sexuality. According to (McGodrick, 2005), Irish people are reserved and they do not like expressing affection in public. Showing emotions is considered a sign of weakness in the Irish society. In regards to sexuality, the Irish use sex for procreation purposes. Premarital pregnancies are considered a disgrace and the practice of sex for enjoyment is not encouraged. Heterosexuality is the only sexual orientation that is accommodated in the Irish culture. This implies that other forms of sexual orientations such as homosexuality and bisexuality are considered to be sinful. Any homosexual person in an Irish family has to keep his or her sexual orientation a secret. In most circumstances, being a homosexual is guaranteed to cut you off from an Irish family. The lack of tolerance for the various sexual orientations other than heterosexuality is a core feature of the Irish culture. No person in my family tree has ever been a homosexual. I believe that the restriction in choosing sexual orientation in the Irish culture is unfair and it denies a person the right to self determination. The consequences of being a homosexual are dire and this may force people to be secretive in their affairs. Irish culture treats the dead in a playful and jovial manner. The Irish community recognizes death as a release from the suffering that occurs in the world. During funerals, the mourners do not grieve openly. Rather, they use the occasion to celebrate the life of the deceased by drinking, playing, engaging in humor and praying (Herry, 2012). Under the Irish culture, the relatives of the deceased hold a wake for the dead where they reminisce on his or her life in a jovial manner. It is imperative that the Irish people do not fear death and they appreciate that it is an inevitable part of life. During funerals, the mourners may be make jokes about the corpse or engage in humorous debates. The Irish culture essentially demystifies the notion of death as a grim gripper. The main reason for holding wakes is for the relatives and friends to pay their last respects to the deceased. When my grandfather died, we held a wake for one night and it was a private occasion for friends and family. In the early Irish generations, more attention was given to the education of boys than for girls. However, the culture has evolved and both boys and girls are now given equal opportunities for education in the Irish culture (Casey, 2009). Generally, Irish culture emphasizes the great importance of education In the ancient times, the Irish monks went out of their way to preserve educational manuscripts during the sixth to the eight century. It is due to the passion for education that the Irish people had that made Ireland to be given the name “Island of Saints of Scholars”. It should be noted that even in the present times, Irish people are among the top scholars in various academic fields. Due to the fact that the Irish people are predominantly Catholics, most of the Irish children were forced to go to Catholic institutions. One of the reasons for this was due to the fear that attending public schools would lead to the seduction of the Irish children to join Protestants. Most Irish parents believed that Catholic schools had high educational standards and would easily facilitate educational achievement (Chan et al, 2009). Irish parents also held the belief that Catholic schools would facilitate upward social mobility for their children. My schooling was mostly in Catholic institutions and my siblings also went through the same channel. My mother believed that the Catholic institutions would help to mould us into responsible persons since the institutions were anchored in religious values. The institutions were very strict especially on matters regarding religion whereby we were not allowed to question the Catholic religion’s beliefs. Essentially, I was not allowed to make an informed decision in regards to the religion that I wanted to follow. The Dutch culture is fundamentally different from the Irish culture. In the Dutch culture, the religion choice for many families is Protestant (Besamusca & Verheul, 2010). However, other religions such Catholics and Jews also exist in the Dutch culture. One notable aspect of the Dutch culture is that it is tolerant to diverse religious views. Therefore, it is not common for the Dutch to impose religious beliefs on all family members. The Dutch culture accepts differences of opinions, people and ideas. One of the reasons for the cosmopolitan culture of the Dutch is due to their exposure to different people as the traded in port. This means that the Dutch culture is very accommodating and versatile. The other important aspect of the Dutch culture is that it advocates for the maintenance of family ties. The extended family has a close knit relationship and family comes first in all aspects. Unlike the Irish culture, the Dutch appreciate the importance of family members staying in touch and supporting each other. The fathers are the heads of the family and they are in charge of running the family. In essence, under the Dutch culture fathers are expected to provide for they family and offers overall leadership. The role of the mother is more or less restricted to catering for her family. The mother is expected to be in charge of the home, take care of the children and support her husband. The Dutch culture has clear responsibilities for all the family members and it is a patriarchal society (Brinks, 2012). Dutch culture allows for the expression of emotion attachment among the members of the community. The Dutch consider marriage to be a very sacred engagement and both parties in marriage must be emotionally committed. Marriage is seen as a serious institution that has to be respected. Parenting is shared by both the mother and father of the children. Raising children is done in an affectionate way. It is therefore appropriate for children to be pampered and praised under the Dutch culture. After evaluating the two cultures, it is evident that I was raised mostly in the Irish culture. Most of the aspects of my upbringing point out that my family was more inclined to wards the Irish culture that the Dutch culture. I was raised under the principles of the Catholic religion and our family took religion seriously. Our relationship with the extended families was not strong and we never met frequently. During our rare meetings, there was no evidence to indicate that we were close to each other. My mother was very firm and this was definitely based on her Irish heritage. I remember that she was very strict and we really feared her. Admittedly, her word was law and we always obeyed her instructions because she could not condone deviant behavior. Our mother was the central figure in the family. In fact, she was directly involved in all the operations of the family and she worked hard to ensure that the family was stable. It is also evident my father was not very outspoken and involved in the day to day affairs of the family. I was concerned that my father was not keen on answering my enquiries concerning our culture. He believed that our cultural background was not important since we had spent all our lives in the United States. However, my mother was very vocal concerning our cultural background which she said is Irish. She believed that our culture was important and it played an important role in shaping our personality. Family Tree My parents were not very certain about the origin of our family. My father’s family came from Germany and France. They may have had French, German, Dutch or English roots. According to my father, my grandfather was a war veteran since he was enlisted in the military during the First World War. My mother’s family came from a region in Ireland that is near the Germany border. Therefore, it is likely that they were basically Irish. However, my parents had no precise records to confirm the origins of their parents as they changed their names when they immigrated to the United States. Conclusion In conclusion, this assignment helped me to learn a lot about my family. Although some enquiries made my parents uncomfortable, I believe the assignment helped us to define where our family stands in terms of culture. I have learnt my cultural background and upbringing has played a significant role in defining my personality and the choices that I have made in life. References Alexandra, A. (2013, January 31). A European ‘Gone Girl’.Wall Street Journal. Retrieved from: http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424127887324610504578274332392782020.html Anderson, J. (2004, August 3). Millennium full of Irish culture.Chicago Tribune. Retrieved from http://articles.chicagotribune.com/2004-08-03/news/0408030101_1_irish-music-irish-culture-folk-music Brinks, H. (2012).Dutch Americans. Retrieved from: http://www.everyculture.com/multi/Du-Ha/Dutch-Americans.html Besamusca, E., &Verheul, J. (Eds.). (2010). Discovering the Dutch: on culture and society of the Netherlands. Amsterdam University Press. Casey, M. R. (2009). Family, History, and Irish America.Journal of American Ethnic History, 28(4), 110-117. Casey, M. R. (2011). Close Encounters of the Irish Kind. American Journal of Irish Studies, 8, 158-168. Chan, G., Barnes-Holmes, D., Barnes-Holmes, Y., & Stewart, I. (2009). Implicit attitudes to work and leisure among North American and Irish individuals: A preliminary study. International Journal of Psychology and Psychological Therapy, 9(3), 317-334. David, M.(2012, May 9). The evolution of dutch culture globally. New York Times. Retrieved from: http://www.nytimes.com/2012/11/15/world/europe/netherlands De Master, C., & Giordano, M. D.  (2005).  Dutch families.  In McGoldrick, M., Giordano, J., & Garcia-Preto, N.  (Eds.)  Ethnicity & family therapy. 3rd Ed.  (pp.534-544). New York: The Guilford Press. Gleeson, D. (2010). Ireland and Irish America: Culture, Class, and Transatlantic Migration (review). New Hibernia Review, 14(1), 145-150. Herry S. (2012, February 25). Irish American Heritage Month celebrated - top facts about the Irish Community in America. Irish Central. Retrieved from http://www.irishcentral.com/news/Irish-American-Heritage-Month-celebrated---top-facts-about-the-Irish-Community-in-America/ McGoldrick, M.  (2005). Irish families.  In McGoldrick, M., Giordano, j., & Garcia-Preto, N.  (Eds.).  (pp.595-615).  New York: The Guilford Press Read More